My name is Dan Curtin, I’m 59 and a half years old. I’m from Wisconsin, “America’s Dairy Land”. I’m a poet, songwriter, and folk-singer. Every poet, however, needs a day job, so for more than 30 years I had worked as a Labor Market Analyst for the State of Wisconsin. I retired a year ago, because I was physically and mentally burned-out. When I retired I weighed 226 pounds at five feet eight inches in height! My blood pressure with medication was running around 156/90; cholesterol was 215, and triglycerides were 175. I became a true couch potato; all I wanted to do was sleep due to all the drugs my doctor had me taking. I was on an anti-depressant (Celexa), a blood pressure medication (Diovan), and Allegra and Flonase inhaler for allergies. For my constant companion, indigestion, I consumed a handful of Tums every day. I was in terrible physical shape. Finally, when I couldn’t walk up the stairs without chest pain, I knew I was heading for real trouble.
In January of 2003 I decided I had to rebuild my health if I was to have any quality of life after retirement. I consulted my personal care physician about my health and my need to lose weight. After discussing various diets, I told him I’d get to work on exercise and weight loss, and see him in six months for a follow-up. That same day I went to our local Barnes & Noble book store to check out what they had in the way of diet/health books. Man, what a shock! There were so many diets I was ready to just give up and go home. As I was scanning the shelves, on my way out the door, one book caught my eye. Staring at me from the cover was a happy looking man holding an apple, with pile of veggies and a loaf of bread in front of him. The book was “The McDougall Program – 12 Days to Dynamic Health” and one of the bullets said, “Decrease or eliminate your need for medication.” I bought the book, and my life was changed for the better.
I found motivation and help in all the other McDougall books and especially from the 6-tape video series. Whenever, I got the urge to indulge in ice cream or double cheese pizza, I got out video number six, “Keeping Healthy Blood Vessels – Winning the War on Cancer.”
After four months on the program I dropped 36 pounds of my excess weight. I was off the Diovan, and my blood pressure without the medication was 135/75 mm Hg. (Before, on medication it was as high as 178/100 mm Hg). I was walking three miles per day and doing some light workouts with my weights, as well as some floor exercises. I bought a new bicycle to ride with my grandchildren.
On August 1, 2003, seven months on the program, I had my annual physical. Here are the results: I dropped 40 pounds since starting, my blood pressure, without medication, is 124/80 mm Hg, cholesterol is 184 mg/dl, triglycerides are 139 mg/dl, and blood sugar is 84 mg/dl. I have no chest pain and can walk 5 miles and bicycle 10 miles in a single day. I am off ALL medications, and have not had to use a Tums in seven months! The most noticeable effect of the program for me is how much energy I now have, and the allergies that plagued me for years are GONE!!!!
As my doctor was leaving the exam room after my annual exam, he gave me a high five and said, “Stay with the McDougall Program, it’s great medicine. I’d like to follow this up in six months.” I smiled all the way home. When I got home, I hopped on my bicycle and went for a victory ride!
“I worked so hard all of my life that I sacrificed my health for wealth. Now that I am retired I would gladly sacrifice my wealth to have my health back,” so many people remorsefully say. Fortunately, wisdom, not wealth, is what is required to regain lost health and appearances. Good food and exercise are essentially free of costs (and profits). Maybe that is why so few people are buying this approach. They think, “If this program does everything he says it does then why doesn’t every doctor recommend it, and why don’t more people follow it? If this proposed solution was really of value then it would cost more.”
For those of you trapped in a “world appraised by money,” I have a “new, improved” program for you. For the diet and exercise to work you must now take two McDougall Super Formula pills a day.* The cost is $2.45 each (unless that is not expensive enough for you, then I can also sell you a slightly more potent version for $12.75 each). You will notice each capsule is embossed with an identification symbol – a large “M.” Buy no substitutes. This “M” stands for “McDougall” (and “Money).”
*The secret ingredients in these capsules are: ½ gram of dried powdered banana, 2 flakes of Quaker Oats, one broccoli micro-flowerette, ¼ of a kidney bean and ½ of a small dried potato eye. For the more expensive formula I have added 3 sesame seeds – increasing the supernatural value of “essential fats.” Do not try to formulate this on your own (under penalty of some law) – only the McDougall Super Formula works – and only when you pay full price for each capsule and take them in recommended amounts, until I pay off my mortgage. However, all bets are off if you fail to follow the diet strictly and exercise while taking my magic pills.
I know this is true: most people do not believe that something as simple and cost-free as food and exercise can get them out of serious trouble, like overweight, diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, bowel distress, arthritis, and a cabinet full of medications. The McDougall Program – 12 Days to Dynamic Health book was written as a challenge to you. In twelve short days you will see that you are not incurably ill, that your fate is in your own hands, and that this is the easiest way to live. Think about it, the difficult way is like Dan Curtin lived before retirement: carrying around an extra 40 pounds, spending hours in the doctor’s office each month, so tired from medications he was almost bed-ridden, depressed, unable to climb stairs due to chest pains, and worried about becoming physically disabled and for his very survival. That’s a difficult life. Now, after retirement – and simply changing his diet and lifestyle – the greatest challenge he faces daily is whether to start each morning with a 5-mile walk or a bike ride with his grandchildren. You deserve the same easy life.
P.S. Mary is worried some reader will soon be calling to buy the McDougall Super Formula pills and not understand this is a joke. I assured her no one who reads our newsletter would be so gullible.