Vivid memories of my mother 16 years ago, shortly after I first turned vegan (pre SS), have been prompted by this thread!:
"You look too thin"
"Sharon (her friend) has noticed you've gotten thinner".
And of two women who've I dated (I no longer am dating either)
"You're too skinny!"
"You're too thin. I worry about crushing you".
My mother is sadly overweight, bordering on obese for her height and weight. Both the latter women, while their BMI would be in range (only just for the latter) I was to find out had significant historic body image and mental health related eating issues.
My BMI is 21.1. It's varied very little over the years. Never gone below 20.4, and never exceeded 22. This isn't true for all the women I mentioned above.
If people are too underweight, yep that's a problem, as well as overweight. But I think also true some of what's been said on this forum about people sometimes now not knowing what normal weight is anymore: it's become very distorted. It was only really after I started running multiple long distance races did my mother quieten down on this.
I'd add to the thread additionally that if somebody has had weight control issues
and mental health problems around weight and eating, there's a good chance in turn that if you're thin
or if you're large, then people's fears and insecurities about their weight may well get projected onto you, from people with these issues.
That's not to judge people who do this: I'm a mental health professional. Sometimes people are unconsciously rationalising that they're being helpful with these kind of comments, with many genuinely being duped into believing the mainstream.
Moral of the story? Take the measurements and the biomarkers to know healthy, and not just looks, Thin and healthy we can be proud to say is very different from underweight and malnourished
"All people are made alike - of bones and flesh and dinner. Only the dinners are different.”
Gertrude Louise Cheney