What I ate: (will edit in later)
B black beans/tortillas/nectarine
L veggie soup/garbanzo beans/grapes
D salad
The restlessness continues. I think a big portion of the root of it, is what I've got on my plate. I want/need to reorg the kitchen. I want to get rid of some dishes and replace with things that make sense and work together. I have a hodge podge of glassware. It doesn't stack well nor fit into the refrigerator well, either. I have a mish-mash of plastic containers that my husband uses to haul lunch back and forth to work. I would like to get 2 matching stock pots that will fit on the stove at the same time and hold a lot for when i make my tomato sauces, cook potatoes for the week, make big batches of rice, and boil up a mess of beans (although I really liked the beans from the crock pot). I just got rid of my juicer that I've had for 14 years. My mom bought each of us kids a juicer when she worked at Dillards. She got them on a good deal. I've used mine off/on since getting it and it has never worn out (probably at least 3mos/year). I just am tired of making space for it in the kitchen and I don't plan on using it any more. I have an electric skillet on its last leg and I will be replacing it with a smaller one (for stir-fries). That's the kitchen.
I have a walk-in closet off the bathroom that I turned into a grow room for starting my garden plants in the spring. i'm getting ready to growing some micro- and baby greens. Way easier for me to grow at home and much more cost efficient. I can run my grow lights through the winter and they won't even show on the electric bill. I just don't have much luck growing greens outdoors. I say that, but this year they were awesome. So, Lord-willing, it will be indoor greens through winter and outdoor spring/summer going forward. I'm also going to start growing onions for eating now and some for transplanting out early in the spring. It seems like no matter how many onions I grow, it is never enough. Going to really up the number this year. Also, will be focusing on growing only one type of potato... Yukon Golds. They do well for me. Will try something new and, at harvest, will parboil and freeze to use until gone. I wanted to type "throughout the rest of the year" but I can go through 10-15lbs per week. That is one thing my husband and teenage son will eat.... baked, chunked potatoes. My son just doesn't get how naturally inclined he is toward eating this way. Praying he really gets it and that he finds a spouse who embraces it, as well. I don't know if my daughter will come around or not. She likes being contrary, right now. She craves meat, so she says. I'm hoping that I can continue as a role model in her life for what eating this way can do for a person.
Husband and I went to check out Planet Fitness. It is right next door to the grocery store where both of our kids work and only 5 minutes away from our house (that's if your caught by a red light at one of the intersections between here and there). I'm ready to join. Husband says he is, but wanted to go with the cheapest plan in case we don't follow through with a whole 12 month commitment. I feel like I already need to be prepared for when he stops going.
**Warning: husband rant**
Do not get me wrong. I love him! That's why it hurts so much to watch him suffer. He complains often of hip and back hurting to the point of being unable to walk. He has had reflux issues for years. He can't put on one of his socks because he can't (won't?) bend over. His mid-section is so thick he can hardly breathe. So, when we drove to the convenience store last night to get his habitual 32 oz syrupy-sweet and fat-rich coffee drink, I asked if I could just talk to him for a moment. I explained about how I had to start telling myself that if I wanted to get healthier and feel better, I had to start telling myself that the things that I knew were contributing to my suffering were nothing more than crap! I, LITERALLY, started calling those things out in my life. I also said that I had, for years, sat in the car when we rolled into the convenience store lot and watched the people that were going in and out of the doors. I didn't want to be associated with them or their lifestyle. They were mostly overweight or obese and oftentimes had kids of various ages tagging along behind them indulging as well. That was one area that I've worked on through the years. I would recognize how our kids were being set up to do the same. Because of that fear of being a bad role model, I've often found the strength (much more success than failure) at simply saying I didn't want anything from inside. I wanted to at least show my kids that saying no was an option. They've adopted drive-thrus and convenience store items as a way of life. But, they both are also learning the price of that lifestyle in that they recognize it makes them feel like crap AND they don't want to spend their money that way. While they aren't embracing health, right now, I do think they may choose differently in the future... just hope it is sooner than later. By sooner, I mean soon enough that it impacts their lives BEFORE they get sick.
**RANT OVER***
My concern, right this minute, is that I sound self-righteous. My failings and short-comings are like writing on the wall... highly visible. I just hope to help others before they make mistakes that are unrecoverable in this life. Some people might say that how they eat doesn't hurt anybody else... but, I would say it hurts everybody around you (and even by the spread of word-of-mouth) who hear your complaints, watch your difficulties in mobility, and are having to plan on methods of caring for you at the end of your life because they already can see where your health is headed. I was a person who claimed that statement. "Your smoking affects everybody because it kills the air. My eating doesn't affect anybody but myself. Leave me alone." I have to shake my head in sorrow. I was so very, very wrong!
One last topic before I sign off today...
As my daughter is heading toward HS graduation, I need to figure out what comes next for me. My commitment was to be home for them until they were done with school. I could simply get a job. Finding the "right" one will be complicated. I've always been trained into jobs utilizing certain skill sets particular to that job. It used to keep me above average pay while not being fully engaged in a career. Another option is going back to school. I've joked since my kids were little that I would go to college when they go to college. Now, I bounce back and forth. Before, it was to satisfy that I could finish a degree. Now, though, I am wondering what I would study if I went back to school. I've got crazy good gardening skills...but, I don't really want to study anything plant- or garden- related. But, one thing that I keep finding myself interested in is nutrition. Working with people to help them find their path to health. I don't know how my age factors into that equation. I will turn 54 before the end of the year and who knows how old by the time I would get a degree in nutrition. Would others welcome me despite my age or just assume I'm "old school" and walk away? That is only the start of the questions... What does that field of study look like? Where could I study? How would I afford it? blah, blah, blah... So, like everything else in life... I've got to just BEGIN...
This helps stop my whining from yesterday.
