A Serendipitous Journey

[nayasmom]

I'm on Day 2 of the ten-day plan. I think I'll be tweaking my food a lot, as I learn what works for me and what doesn't. I used to have soymilk in my morning coffee, and when I stopped wanting coffee I used soymilk in my morning tea. Now I read that soymilk is not good for me. Yesterday I bought almond milk and now that's my new tea additive.
My rebirth was November 30, 2012. That's the day I had my gallbladder removed. On December 2, I had to have an ERCP to find out what was still wrong with me. A stent was placed in the bile duct, and I got pancreatitis. Then I developed an ileus on top of that. Having worked in hospitals the last 25 years, I'm familiar with what pancreatitis can do to a person, up to and including killing one.
My surgeon warned me I had to change my diet "or else". No more dairy, said he, and go low fat, said he. And ... low carb. Said he. I can't do low carb. If I'm going to be vegan, I have to eat carbs! I think he meant simple carbs. Step away from the Triscuits.
I was finally well enough to be discharged on December 10, 2012, and thus began my journey into being vegan. I was already ovo-lacto veg for nearly 35 years, so the switch was fairly easy.
I've had OCD with food all my life. One of my fears was that it would sabotage me. Something changed, though, inside my head. I still am on that "see food" diet, but what I want to eat lots of doesn't come out of a box or bag, and doesn't have any animal derived ingredients. I had to stop eating Triscuits because they made me sick. I had to stop eating the cocoa almonds (dry roasted) because a large bag lasted me barely a week. My diet sheet allowed me 3 egg yolks per week, but I had to stop eating them because they too made me sick. I stopped using oil to cook with, stopped using margarine on my toast... stopped eating toast. I got stuck on boca burgers after finding out that Morningstar products contain milk derivatives unless they were too high in fat for me to eat. I lost my desire for coffee so switched to tea.
About six weeks after my ordeal, my full appetite came back, but the cravings never started. I had no problem forever saying NO to cheese, which I used to be addicted to.
I learned how to cook without fats of any kind. I trolled blogsites for vegan low fat recipes. I got hooked on Snyder's Old Tyme style pretzels. I ate up to 6 servings of fresh fruit a day, mixed with nuts, coconut, flaxseed, and maraschino cherries. I ate a lot of bread.
August of 2013 I started training for the Redrun in Virginia City in October. I had a problem with having to cut a run short to come home and use the potty. I got 'er done, though, and had a blast at the Redrun, and finished a little under my expected time.
I lost not one ounce.
In 2009, I was overworded, under-rested, stressed out, and ballooned up to my all-time high of 212 lbs. By January 2010 I had gotten down to 204 lbs, and hovered there for the next 3 years. When I was admitted for surgery, I weighed 194 lbs. In March I got down to 169 lbs, then back to 175 lbs, and since then have stayed at that weight, regardless what activity I engage in, even though I wasn't eating more food. What's worse, my cholesterol/triglycerides were increasing. This past December, my triglycerides were at 339. What the heck was going on???
My pcp just wanted me to start on a statin, which I did. Heart disease runs in my family on my father's side, and I don't want to be his daughter in that way. That way lies misery and early death. I couldn't get an answer from anyone, though, on what I could do dietarily to get my numbers down. Before surgery my blood pressure was headed upward, around 180/90, and now it's a wonderfully normal 110/68. What else can I do to "fix" myself?
Well, I'm an internet junkie, so I started researching online about being a vegan with high triglycerides. Like most people, I thought it was from eating too much fat. I learned that it's sugars, not fats, that determine triglyceride levels. And I was eating a LOT of sugars in the form of the pretzels and the breads, and even the massive amounts of fruit I consumed nearly every day.
Which brings me to the McDougall plan. I've read about his ideas and they make total sense, but I couldn't say good-bye to cheese. I didn't want to not have parmesan on my spaghetti, or green chili and cheese tamales. Grilled cheese sandwiches were my "gourmet" eating-out food of choice. I just couldn't "go there".
Thank goodness that choice was taken from me!! I say that I'm blessed to have gone through my ordeal with pancreatitis, because it gave me the determination and strength to make the necessary changes.
And now I have to make even MORE changes. I put the bread into the freezer, put away the nuts, said good-bye to pretzels forever, and switched the veg to fruit ratio so that I have no more than 2 servings of fruit per day. I have tons of rices and other grains, so it's no problem for me to cook using a variety of legumes, rice, quinoa, etc. My biggest challenge is getting 6 servings (or more) of veggies a day, especially greens.
Another challenge is to have courses with each meal. I live alone so I tend to do a lot of the one-pot meals with no salad or anything, and I'd like to change that up so I can start getting more salads on board.
I also entered a marathon in August. It sounds like an extreme action, but in the 90's I was a runner and completed two marathons before knuckling under to depression.
I'm a mixed bag of issues, but slowly I'm working through them. I have the support of family and friends on my journey, even though none of them are ready to come with me. It's okay!
Journaling is important and something I tend to start out great guns on but taper to a lot of blank days... months. I joined Sparkpeople.com in January 2010 and I'm doing great if I post a blog entry per month. What's different about this particular site is that I'm among like-minded folks who are struggling to resolve health issues or have maintained great and optimal health by following the McDougall plan. I want it to work for me, too. I want to get my cholesterol and triglycerides down to a normal and healthy level AND I want to lose at least 40 lbs to be in ideal running form. My next lab work is in April, and if cholesterol is normal, I will stop the statin. I'll have blood work in June to make sure I'm still at healthy levels.
My name is Robyn, and I have OCD.

[nayasmom]

Day 4 of the McDougall ten-day diet. I do not like a lot of vinegary, lemony taste in my food, Sam-I-Am. I made a kind of slaw with red and green cabbage, to which I added thinly sliced red and green bell pepper, caraway seed, and a dressing of dijon and rice vinegar and balsamic vinegar. Then I made some fat-free hummus using chickpeas and lime juice with a pinch of cumin. Too much lime juice, and mixed with the slaw was just overwhelming. Trying the slaw the next day (today, for lunch) made it no better, so I think I will call it a failed experiment and leave it alone.
On Sparkpeople.com I joined a challenge to weigh less on 1/1/15 than I did on 1/1/14. One of my resolutions was to not weigh myself at all this year, but I made a liar out of myself. Curiousity got the better of me and I got on the scale this morning at work. It seems I have lost 1 lb.
Now the challenge is not to get all crazy and start eating everything in sight.
I haven't counted calories or measured portions. Counting calories is for me a binge trigger and measuring portions just means I eat more portions and then there's the guilt factor which does no one a bit of good, least of all me.
And another thing... !! Sweet potatoes can't be a regular part of my diet. They just don't stick to my ribs enough for long enough. I think maybe I'll keep one or two baked sweet potatoes to eat bits of for dessert, because I do love me some sweet potato. Not yams... but the real deal. I remember when I was in the Japanese equivalent of kindergarten going on a field trip to a farm where we dug up sweet potatoes. Man, I think schools in America should have field trips to students' homes to mow lawns, because it's the best way to get kids to work and have fun doing so. That makes it more like volunteer work. Or shoveling sidewalks, or washing cars.
I digress.
But sweet potato digging was the bomb for us kids. It was like panning for gold. Plus we got to take home some loot. What's not to love about that? But I also remember in winter in Japan, sidewalk vendors sold hot sweet potatoes pretty much like in Germany with hot chestnuts.

So yesterday for breakfast I had some tofu (4 oz) with my morning rice medley and lentils. This morning I woke up feeling groggy and unwilling to get out of bed, like before I started the McDougall diet, and I think I need to hold off on eating tofu for a while, or at least getting a different kind. Instead of tofu this morning, I simply had my rice medley and lentils with kimchi and pickled ginger and some nori furikake. And a sprinkle of sesame seeds. Then I added potatoes o'brien, with diced red and green bell pepper and green onion. So here's a news flash... I don't like bell peppers in my potatoes like this. In fact, I rather like my potatoes plain, with maybe some fresh onion and garlic mixed in, and that's it.

When I make split pea soup, I don't put potatoes in it. Instead of the carrots, though, I chopped up baby kale and added that in. It's a lovely soup, nice and thick and yummy. For lunch today I added a baked potato, and chunked it up with my spoon. Holy chorizo! It was like having mashed potatoes and gravy it was that good!! I don't think it would feel so comfortable (or comforting) if I simply diced the potatoes and added them as part of the soup. Split pea soup is my favorite soup anyway, and now there's one more reason to go ga-ga over it.

I see the dietician on the 29th, which just happens to be day 10 of the McDougall plan. I'll take my food diary and have her look it over. I don't honestly know what she's going to think, but I'm open to hearing suggestions. I'm open-minded, but if I am not sure of what I'm hearing, it's my prerogative to figure out what's best for me and stick to that plan.
Onward and upward.

[nayasmom]

I splurged this weekend. Saturday I started my marathon training program with a 1-mile jog. Same on Sunday, only that time I didn't walk any.
I did have two sandwiches, stuffed full of veggies and avocado, and yesterday I had pizza. The pizza turned out kind of disappointing; the crust was so thin that the juice from the tomatoes and pizza sauce made it soggy in the middle. I felt like it could have spent another 30 seconds in the oven and been better for it. And what am I complaining for anyway? That pizza was so piled up with fresh veggies, no wonder the middle got a little soggy! That should be a good thing.
I ate half of a small, and ate the other half for supper. Usually I get a medium and eat 2/3 of it and then finish the rest later. So this is an interesting subtle change.
Sometimes too I sabotage myself and I know I'm doing it and I know I'm the only person who's going to get hurt by it. Yesterday at the dollar store I got a bag of fruit jelly candies... artificially flavored no less. I ate about half the bag before just throwing the rest away. It was mindless and stupid. Of course I always lose, because cheap sugar crap makes me cranky and tired for no good reason. And the lesson is, of course, that I won't be doing this again.
Last week I got a package of some kind of tortillas that were very low in fat, made with wheat, and they were disgusting. Bleah. I ate one and tossed the rest of the package in the trash. I completely forgot about the brand I usually get, also very low in fat, but made with better ingredients, and which are delicious.
And here is where I say that I can't imagine life without my EZ Bean cooker. It's an electronic pressure cooker, and a lifesaver. It has pre-programmed settings for a variety of legumes, and even though the recipe pamphlet calls for adding oil, it's not necessary. I just don't ever add salt to the water. Haven't had a problem with foam at all, or the internal combustion that often accompanies eating canned beans. Anyway, I cook my rice in the pressure cooker as well, and use the lentil setting which is lower pressure and only 12 minutes cook time. Most other legumes are are cooked in an hour or less. The only down side is that the non-stick interior is not sturdy. I've had my EZ Bean Cooker for about 6 months now and there's already a gouged spot in the bottom of the pot, and I only use plastic or wood to scoop the rice or beans out.
In any case, if I had to decide which appliance is the most important to the vegan kitchen, I might have to choose that pressure cooker.
Robyn

[nayasmom]

Day 9 of the McDougall diet. I'm feeling pretty darned good.
Conversations about what I'm doing, and especially what I'm eating, naturally revolve around concerns about getting enough protein. If I can explain that away, then the subject is broached about the advocacy of the low-carb diets that seem to help so many people lose weight. I can't convince anyone that a low-carb diet is probably quite dangerous, so I have to go the practical route. I ask pro-low carb folks why they have such terrible cravings for carbs if their diet is so good and so healthy for them.
Why is strict adherence to a low carb diet so difficult? If a person is truly at optimal health on low carb, s/he shouldn't be having cravings, right?
And then I say that I have had NO cravings for proteins or fats while on this McDougall diet. None. I don't crave even the pretzels I was eating so many of just a few days ago. I haven't craved the nuts I used to eat every day. And I certainly haven't craved any dairy products in over a year. It's true that I look fondly on foods I used to eat con mucho gusto, and I have thoughts of wishing I could go back to that way again, but I know that it's a deadly dream and am happy to just have some occasional wistfulness and wishful thinking and leave it at that.
I have a coworker on Weight Watchers and I'm so sad for her because Weight Watchers doesn't actually work as a lifelong way of eating. It is designed for failure, and not just that, but chronic failure. Then it is designed to bully people into compliance, and heap guilt trip upon guilt trip to keep them coming back to the abuse of feeling like idiots because they can't stop feeling hungry all the time. This coworker told me that she can have all the salsa she wants because it's a no-point food. She can't have salsa with tortillas or on potatoes or anything else, but she can have all the salsa she wants. Bleah. There's only so much salsa I can personally stand, and after that I want to run screaming away from it for about 6 months.
Another coworker lost quite a bit of weight using some kind of protein or meal replacement shake. Great. To me, it's like having predigested food, baby food. Digestion begins in the mouth. Chewing activates the digestive enzymes in saliva to prepare masticated food for nutrient absorption in the mouth, esophagus and eventually the stomach and onward. It's how foods are prevented from ulcerating the esophageal lining and the stomach lining. Drinking meals is like swallowing food whole without chewing. And then there's the issue of liquid meals being so utterly boring, and most often too sweet as well. I'm sorry but I do not eat chocolate for breakfast; why would I want to drink a meal that's rich and chocolatey? Ugh.
As well, who wants to do that the rest of their lives?? Even the high-protein formulas that are guaranteed to make one feel fuller for longer... that's pure cow manure. You only feel full for the length of time there's something in the stomach. Once a liquid meal passes through the stomach (at lightning-fast speeds no less), the hunger comes right back. Epic fail, guaranteed, every time.

Here I am with my 10 day diet and I eat as much as I want, whenever I feel like I need to eat, and I have no cravings for anything not on the plan. It isn't easy, but it is supremely doable. I just keep in mind that I have to eat so much in vegetables, so much of that in greens, and I'm good to go. When I made my rice and grains hot cereal this morning I completely forgot to add some fruit, and it was just fine without it. I used brown jasmine rice and some Himalayan red rice as the base, and that mix right there is so flavorful and yummy all by itself with no other flavoring added.
Why would I be crazy enough to trade that deliciousness in for something in a glass that's too sweet and tastes like a chocolate milk shake? Simply, I wouldn't.

[nayasmom]

I had my dietician appointment yesterday. It went well for what it's worth, which is to say I came up against a brick wall of prejudice toward anything carbohydrate. I kind of expected it. I just wish I knew what I could say in answer to her pooh-poohs. I'm also disappointed that a registered dietician, someone who has a degree in nutrition, can be so ignorant.
Essentially, she was fine with my recent changes: cutting way back on fruit, eliminating bread and other processed grain foods (at least for now), eliminating other processed foods like the boca burgers, anything to do with cutting back on carbs. I saw the raised eyebrows when I listed my main foundation foods, like rices, whole grains and seeds, legumes, and potatoes of every kind.
The RD essentially lumped all the carbs into one category, "Bad". She questioned my protein intake, and I said there's plenty in my food, and she basically shook her head that no, there's not enough in what I'm eating right now. Really. Then where is my increased energy coming from? And how do those super-athletes on raw vegan diets get their nutritional needs met?
The RD mentioned that super-athletes also follow the (joke) paleo diet, too. I wouldn't know... I never hear about a super-athlete waxing poetical on the (joke) paleo diet. But if two super-athletes can do what they do and one is on a raw vegan diet, then doesn't that answer her question over protein? The RD even placed more importance on my getting enough fat in my diet than enough good complex carbs. I said there's enough in what I'm eating and again she shook her head no. Excuse me? I think my body proves otherwise!

But wait! there's good news. The good news is the RD wants me to continue with the McDougall diet for 3 months now, and in May I will have a lab panel drawn and then we'll get back together and discuss the results. I saw that gleam in her eye - she is very sure I'm going to come out diabetic. And that's fine. I get to continue with what I'm doing with her blessing, and we WILL see, won't we, how my labs change?
Also, I lost 3 lbs during these last ten days. Believe me, I have ocd with food... I did not go hungry, ever. When the panic hit, I listened when I was told to eat some starches. I didn't count calories, didn't do portion measuring (the expressway to a panic binge), just kept to what is on the plan and making sure I got plenty of fresh veg and greens incorporated wherever I can sneak them in.
One of my IBS friends is trying the ten day plan. She complained yesterday that she ate a salad with vinaigrette and immediately got the bloat. Well, that's going to happen, anyway, because she can't eat a lot of raw veggies right now. She's been told over and over they have to be cooked, and sometimes cooked a lot. But if she stays on this diet for ten days, I know she will find that her symptoms and reactions have lessened to a more manageable level.
An acquaintance of mine suffers pretty much daily migraines. I told her about the McDougall diet, and gave her the web address, and said there are testimonials from people who suffered the same way she does now. If she likes what she sees, who knows, maybe I've reached another person who can find help and health here.
As for the training... so far I have had no urgency issues at all.
Robyn

[kkrichar]

Hi Robyn. I really like your journal. I'm trying to stay close these days to the people following the McDougall plan. I get a little OCD with reading journals. After awhile I've read everything and I'm left waiting for a new entry. I was so excited to see a new journal!!

I cannot wait to hear what your dietician says in 3 months. This is your chance to show her what this WOE can do!! I don't think I could have remained calm through the head shaking and the ignorant statements. Sigh.

I'm also looking forward to following your marathon training! I run too and love to hear about other runners and their races. I signed up for my first 5K of the year in March. I ran it last year and my running has not improved since. I think I'm as fast as I'm going to get at this weight. I need to lose the weight if I want to see improvements in my times. I'm excited to see how I do in March after 4 months on plan. On a more delicate matter, I can relate to your training "issues." I have my running routes designed around the location of public restrooms. It's winter now and they have all closed for the season. I've been worried about that but so far I haven't had a problem. Granted, I've run inside a lot the last month due to the weather but I haven't been stopping the treadmill for potty breaks either. I hadn't thought about it being due to strict adherence to the food plan. Hmmm.

Well, I'm glad you're here and look forward to following your journal!

[nayasmom]

Ms. kkrichar, you are the first person to write a comment in my journal! I'm so happy! And thank you.
My past history is full of dysfunction in interpersonal (especially family) relationships. A lot of denial, enabling, addiction behavior (alcoholism, otc meds addiction..) and especially the isolationist mentality. That last is one of my biggest challenges, as I tend to be a loner and keep to myself even in public situations. So journaling is important to me, as is the fellowship I get from being part of an online community, and it's also part of the program even though no one actually says that. But it is.
Yesterday I posted on my sparkpeople blog about being on the McDougall diet and the one response was from someone who claimed, "I did the high starch diet and I just craved even more starches and sweets and stayed fat". Again it was the broad dismissal of all starches/carbs as "BAD". I just don't know how to respond to people like that. Like, gee, maybe the starch craving is because her body really needed it, and maybe she was staying fat because she still cooked with fat or ate meat or who knows what. I wasn't vague with my description of what I eat now; in fact it was pretty detailed.
So there's one person who is convinced that the McDougall diet doesn't work, and that's okay.
I'm still shouting it from the rooftops.
And I'm happy that the RD told me to go ahead and stay with the McDougall diet. I told her though that the 24th was the last day I took the statin/niacin. I hated the constant itchy skin, the flushing, and feeling like I was turning into an alligator. I stuck it out for 11 days, and it simply became unbearable.
As for training, it's going great. I'm doing small increases with the daily run, and adding a mile a week to the long run until I reach 15 miles. After that the long run will be staggered (10, 18, 12, 20) right before the taper. It will be interesting to see if my innards behave this time! I think the reason I was having such issues before was because of all the fruit I ate every day. I think the overload of fruit (sugar) contributed as well to my chronic exhaustion. I was coming home from work wanting to fall into bed and sleep for several hours instead of going out for a run. I just never made the connection until I joined this site and read everything I could about how to eat. Now I come home and actually have a conscious afternon/evening where I accomplish things!
Now, the thing about speed: I don't worry about it. The truth about the way I run is that many people can walk faster than I run. No joke!! I'm slow. I'm the tortoise. I'm the tortoise in the cartoon with the hi-yupyup goofy attitude. I am competition for no one. And that is just the way I like it. When I did the Redrun in October, those zombies were disappointed with me because I would just hand over my flag if I happened to have one. When I earned one at one of the obstacles, I gave it to the guy who helped me out. Let him deal with dodging those zombies. I just wanted to finish the course. My whole reason for entering these things is to finish, because that is never guaranteed, no matter how fit or trained I am.
IF you want to be faster, you don't get there by just running faster and getting used to it. You do speedwork. Those are the sprint-run-sprint-run intervals. You run for say 100 yds, sprint back to the beginning, run out 100 yds, sprint back to the beginning. Over time, the muscle fatigue leads to the development of peripheral veins, for more efficient exchange of oxygen-depleted for oxygenated blood, and that leads to a decrease in muscle fatigue. Also, you will be able to coordinate your breathing with the increase in speed over time, so you don't get that gasping-for-air effect. If you try the speedwork once a week, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised that you find yourself naturally going a little faster over time.
And I haunt this discussion board as well. When I'm surrounded by Doubting Thomases, it's too easy to become doubtful myself, so I hang out here reading and reading and reading because I need the constant reminder that I AM doing the right thing for my health. I tag testimonials for friends who either have or are married to someone who has similar medical issues, whether it's breast cancer, RA, lupus, heart disease, overweight... I want to be the living proof that "McDougalling" works.
Robyn

[nayasmom]

*Sigh*
I might have to strike yet another restaurant off my list. I ordered my usual wonderful salad, and a baked potato with salsa on the side. They didn't have baked potatoes... I think it's a supper menu item. So I got a larger salad. And in that salad the sloppy preparer had dropped two bits of bacon into it, and a small bit of feta cheese.
If I ever eat there again, I will have to make specific modification requests... like for the preparer to wash his hands and make sure the salad fixin's don't have anything in them I don't want or I will send it back for a redo. I hate to be so in-your-face about it, but ... my usual mantra enters here... "My life depends on it". And it does.
How come this feels like activism? Why do I even have to ask this question? As the consumer, I expect my meal to be prepared to my specifications. If I want something NOT to be in my food, why should I accept the accidental addition of that something? In any amount?

This morning I have a fragrant home. I just baked a pile of yukon gold potatoes. Later I'm going to make a big pot of split pea soup. I'm nearly out of the green, so will have to add yellow to the mix. It's all good. I can eat split pea soup over a yukon gold potato every day, even every meal. I have fresh spinach to add to the soup to get my greens.
So since I broke my resolution of not weighing myself for a year, I'll make Wednesdays weigh-in day for me now. I'd like to track weekly weight changes (if any) for a couple of months just to gauge if I'm doing the diet right or not. Friends say I'm getting smaller, but because I still have a Mrs Potato Head torso, I can't see the other changes. That could be so.
Today I'm doing a 2 mile "long run". It isn't much at this point, but as long as I progress, I'm happy with what I'm doing. It's freezing cold out, and I have terrible runny nose issues because of it, but I know to take a kleenex along now. And it's not forever. The day will soon come when I will be complaining about the heat or the dust.
We might get snow today... wouldn't that be a fine thing!
Robyn

[nayasmom]

Oh, and I read about the "Perfect Health Diet" which advises 60% plant foods, 8 to 16 oz meat, and lots of fats from meat and plant sources. Gag me.
The irony of the claims of this diet being for "Perfect Health" is that vitamin supplementation is necessary.
I don't have any vegan friends that I can think of off the top of my head. I don't even think any of them are vegetarian. I do have first-hand observations, therefore, of the chokehold the meat and dairy industries have over the average American.
It could also be an addiction. I have an old friend who had two heart attacks in the past, and now takes cholesterol, hypertension, and type II diabetes meds. He struggles to keep his weight to a healthy level, and is within 10 lbs of when he was in the army, but when I knew him back then he still had a bit of a beer belly. But most of all he reports struggling daily with food, to keep his weight at a normal "healthy" level, and yet... he still has to take these meds. He complains that the cholesterol meds make him tired all the time. I have been after him to visit this site, to read the articles, the testimonials, everything. His wife had breast cancer in her 20's and now deals with lupus, chronic kidney stones (about once a month), gut issues, and goes through her days in a daze, with inconsistent sleep habits, chronic migraines, chronic gut pain, etc.
But neither will give up meat.
What's sadder is that neither one will even try the McDougall diet for ten short days. They won't do it to try and prove it wrong. What's up with that? They'd rather go through each day in misery and discomfort or pain, living off of drugs that offer absolutely no relief at all. In fact, my friend complains all the time that he's dissatisfied with his wife's doctors because they won't find out what is causing her problems, and they just say try this pill or that pill and when the pills don't work he starts all over again with the complaints, the runaround, the useless drugs. And neither one is willing to try this diet because it just might get them off this nightmare of a merry-go-round and they would not only save big money but live each day fully conscious.
I don't get this attitude. I don't get this "rather fight than switch" solidarity with the S.A.D.
Robyn

[kkrichar]

HI Robyn. Yeah, I do speed work. I do intervals, tempos, fartleks, hill repeats as well as easy runs and long slow distances. I was in track and cross country "back in the day." I've changed my form, my turnover rate, my shoes (with and without custom orthotics). I've seen physical therapists, chiropractors, massage therapists and acupuncturists. I've taken barefoot running classes and signed up for coaching from Runner's World. I switched to the Jeff Galloway run/walk method to decrease stress on my tendons and improve recovery time. Every time I get to a certain distance or speed my body breaks downs. I get injured. I have to take time off from running and start over from the beginning again. There is nothing more to try or change other than my weight. All the research I've done suggests weight as the cause of my particular injuries. In 2011 I lost some weight and my running got better but I gained it back and my running got worse. There's only so fast or far my poor body can go lugging 40-50 extra pounds. I don't plan to be a competitive runner either. Once, during a race, I was passed by a woman wearing one of those medical boots on her foot. She was walking and I was running! Hahaa, I just want to see what my body can do when fueled by exactly what it needs and carrying the proper amount of weight. It used to feel so good to just take off on a long run and get lost in my thoughts. That doesn't happen much anymore. I still love running but I want to feel less encumbered.

How did your 2 miler go today?

I know what you mean about the resistance to trying the McDougall plan. It's almost of point of pride for some people to say they absolutely will never try it. Then, they talk about how their meds cost more than their social security income. Sigh. We just need to show the way.

Bummer about the restaurant. I have one restaurant I go to now. It's frustrating sometimes.

Well, I need to get started on my long run.

[nayasmom]

Hey there! My 2 mile "long run" went very well!! Where I go, I always send a text msg to a friend to let her know I'm starting out; that way if for some reason I don't come back, she knows where I am supposed to be and can call for help. I also use that to time how long it takes me to come back. The route has mile markers (yay!) so I can gauge my distance out. Anyway, it took me 30 minutes to do the 2 miles, which is fantastic! I always hope to be able to average a 15 minute mile. Granted this is only 2 miles, but it's a great sign for me overall, and I give credit to this diet in large part.
And it always makes me laugh to get all into explaining about training methods because it always turns out I'm talking to someone with a LOT more experience than I have.
I have at least 40 more lbs to lose before I feel like I'm at a healthy weight, but I don't expect an increase in speed to be one of the positive side-effects. If it happens, it happens. Embarrassingly, though, people seem to keep mistaking me for a boy, and it's not like I don't have a <ahem> female form! I was told a long long time ago that I have "boys legs" though. Maybe it's that I wear baggy tops... who can say?
When I was a kid, exercise was like another country to me, and one I didn't have or want a passport to. When I joined the army, I got much stronger, but still didn't like the idea of the 2-mile run for PT tests every quarter. In fact, I just never liked jogging, period. When I was about 31 or so, I worked with a lady (another contract person) who jogged 2 miles every day, just a relaxed pace, something to allow her to maintain her active social life (eating out all the time, basically, and drinking on Fridays and Saturdays), but she invited me to come with her and for whatever reason, my love of running was born then. It just took off. I ran the Bay to Breakers a couple times, and a bunch of 10K runs around the Bay Area (I was living near San Jose). Then I did the SF half marathon twice. And then... I did the NYC Marathon twice.
And then I stopped. It's kind of like Forrest Gump, except I was stopped by depression. It's taken 15 years now for me to find enough recovery to get going again, so better late than never again.
I had a friend who wanted to run longer and faster, but he wouldn't commit to the work needed to get there. He felt like it should just come naturally. I've got news! But that's in the past and he never did go anywhere with it... and essentially just stopped thinking about it. And that's fine, because running isn't for everyone.
And here's a story for you: when I did the NYC Marathon the 2nd year, I was already suffering from the effects of untreated depression (undiagnosed, too), and it was a struggle to go the distance. Every mile I completed, I kept thinking, "I'll do one more mile and get on the bus". Somehow I made it to mile 15 that way, and as I was bent over trying to relax my legs, a voice asked if I was okay. I turned around and found myself staring at someone's waist. A very tall man had stopped to see if I was okay. He was like an angel sent down to save me. I said I'm not doing so well, and he plucked me up by my collar and took me along with him. I had to keep jogging to keep up with his walking pace, and he talked about his knee surgeries LOL. I was a very sad mess that day, but that man got me across the finish line and I will never forget him. That day, as we were getting through the last mile in Central Park, some fella jumped out and took our picture and then yelled at the man, "Hey! I got a photo of you running with your SON!"
Anyway, now you have an idea why I named my journal A Serendipitous Journey. Whenever something bad happened, I was plucked up by a guardian angel and dragged along until I got my feet back under me. That marathon was a story of my life.
I feel like this time it will be a somewhat different tale to tell. I've got a more positive mindset now, and I know about the chronic depression, so I have better tools to deal with it these days. I feel too that changing my diet to follow Dr. McDougall's recommendations is a huge step in the right direction, not just for physical but also mental health. I believe that food is our first-line of mendicants. We nourish our bodies but food also nourishes our heads and hearts if we let it. I believe that when we eat food harvested by violence, we become that violence. I cook for my dogs, and I only buy organic, humanely produced meat for them.

I have the feeling that as your weight goes down, your speed will increase, like naturally. Maybe mine will, too, when I'm not paying attention!
Take care!
Robyn

[nayasmom]

Here's a little detail that sometimes causes concern: Since I got out of the hospital, I can't taste salt. I haven't reached the point where salted food is not tasty to me, because I can't taste it in the first place. I have gotten into the habit of adding no salt to my cooking, because at table I use so much of it just to get that little bit of seasoning going. Perhaps at some point I'll decide that my food is delicious all by itself, and learn to cut way back or cut salt out altogether. It could very well be that I simply can't taste most seasoning, not just salt.

Also, in the last couple of days I have been feeling that awful panic hunger. Not sure what's causing it, because I'm absolutely not starving myself at all, or making any attempt to control how much I eat. It feels like I get hungry within an hour of eating. I don't feel like it's causing bloat or weight gain. Maybe my body is panicking because it's having to utilize my rather generous amount of adipose. That's been my protective armor for so many years, maybe I'm afraid of being vulnerable to the emotions that come with being around other people. Even writing this, I suddenly feel an overwhelming need to eat, and if I don't go warm up my split pea soup and potatoes very soon, I'll start getting low blood sugar symptoms.

Otherwise I feel pretty good. Whenever I feel tired, I can track it to something I ate the day before that would have been better off not eaten. For breakfast I had miso with Japanese wheat noodles, green onion, and spinach. I would have been better off using white beans instead of the noodles, and a tiny bit of tofu. Later in the afternoon I had some dates, which are about pure fruit sugar. When I felt tired yesterday, I knew it was from eating the craisins in my salad on Saturday, and most likely added sugar or other sweetener in the apple cider vinaigrette. It's all education. Two steps forward for every one step backward. It's human nature, I think, to fight what we know inherently to be true, because we need to constantly test ourselves, push those buttons, and learn the hard way.
Robyn

[nayasmom]

I had a large bowl of rice medley and lentils with nori, kimchi, pickled ginger, and Bragg's Liquid Aminos. Mmmmm. Rice is the food of my ancestors. Can't get enough of the stuff! Growing up, it was almost like a ritual to cook rice. Every Japanese household (even those not in Japan) has a rice cooker, except perhaps mine - I use a pressure cooker to cook my rices. But I remember having to measure out the rice in the pan, and swish changes of water in and carefully pour it out, because back then rice was mixed with talc. I have the feeling it was for insect invasion prevention. And I have to say that I never saw any bugs in our rice.
But then when the rinsing was done, the pan would go into the cooker, the lid would go on, and with just the push of the button, it would cook to perfection in about 20 to 30 minutes.
I remember one time visiting my Grandmother around New Year, which is the major Japanese holiday. Three of my uncles put on their dark blue short robes with the ties pulling back the voluminous sleeves, the white head bands, and they pounded mochi rice in the traditional wooden tub (looks like it's carved out of the trunk of a tree) with the traditional mallets, and chanted the chant and did a kind of dance around the tub. It's hypnotic, really, to watch.
There is so much love and history in rituals. Eating mochi is like prayer; I picture the pounding ceremony, the chanting, and it's like I hold a gift of love in my hands, I'm eating that love and that ritual. You can't be angry after eating mochi, or hold ill will about anything. Mochi is the ultimate world forgiveness.

I emailed my sister-in-law with love this morning. I told her about the McDougall diet, and how I believe if she has faith and gives the ten day diet a chance, she can have true relief and eventually heal from her crohn's. She is grossly overweight now as a result of years of prednisone and joint pain. She is trapped by the need to always be close to a bathroom. I told her I need her to stick around in this world, that I wish she could live a life free from pain, and that she can one day love waking up in the morning because she is pain free and symptom free. Will she consider it? Yes. Will she give the McDougall diet a chance? I have no idea.
I've told my adopted Mom about the McDougall diet. She and her husband have been my mentors for over 30 years, and I refer to them as my spiritual parents. She survived breast cancer, and he battles type II diabetes, overweight, hypertension, sleep apnea, and who know what else. He has yo-yo dieted all his adult life, and it never gets better. Every time he stops dieting, he gains even more weight than before. I need him to stick around my life, too. And the question I ask everyone is: If you think this diet won't work, how's your present regimen working for you? And I think some of this statement is true, that people would rather be fat, sick and keep eating rich addicting junk than truly take responsibility for their health and adopt a pure, clean way of eating that guarantees a change for the better in their overall health.
Yes, it's been a LOT easier for me, because 1) I was already vegetarian, 2) I had life-threatening pancreatitis and 3) I want to run another marathon or few again. On the other hand, having OCD is no walk in the park; in fact, it's awful, but that too is its own blessing. OCD has allowed me to be hypervigilant about the food I eat. I still eat compulsively, but I'm obsessive about WHAT I eat now. Amazingly, that OCD has given me the strength - willpower if you will - to say goodbye to what I see as lethal foods. I panic when I get stomach pain or nausea now, because that's what pancreatitis feels like. I don't want to become insulin dependent, I don't want pancreatic cancer, and I sure don't want pancreatitis ever, EVER again.
One of the things that sets the McDougall diet apart from all others is that it's something you do because you love your life and your body. It's not a punishment or revenge for the betrayal of being hungry or craving carbs or binge eating after deprivation and so on. It is simple, nourishing, and full of all kinds of love. It requires a lot of faith that over time it will work, and work wonders. If faith isn't love, what is?
Robyn

[nayasmom]

I weighed in today: 172 lbs. A gain of a pound, but I'm happy anyway because before I'd lose weight one week and immediately pop right back up to 174/175. And there I'd stay for months again.
This represents a huge change, and a huge step forward. I'm building up muscle again, and I also ate too much sugar and fat this past weekend with that salad at Lumberjacks, with the walnuts and craisins and apple chips.
It could very well be that my panic hunger was due to the reactions to the extra fat and sugar. It's all good. I'm ahead of the learning curve still.
I made Spanish rice yesterday in the pressure cooker. I added quinoa to the rice, anc a chopped green and a chopped yellow bell peppers. And a chopped onion, and some paprika, with a large can of tomatoes. I'm having that today, over baked yukon gold potatoes, with a bunch of fresh spinach to steam while the meal is heating up, and I threw in a bunch of salsa, too. That's lunch. If I'm still hungry, I'll finish the rest of the hot cereal from this morning.
It seems like every 3 days now I'm baking a huge trayful of potatoes, yukon golds, reds, and sweets. Once a week I cook a big pot of rice. The rest is soups and stews.
On the Sparkpeople page on facebook someone complained about not having energy to ride her bicycle anymore, that it was a huge effort to just go 3 or 4 miles in an hour. Of course, there had to be the suggestion to up the protein. I had to shoot that down. I can no longer sit quietly by while people continue to spout off ignorant nonsense. Whenever I complained about being tired, my friends always said to eat more protein. No more!! it's not the protein!! The poster admitted to eating a lot of meat and cheese sandwiches on white bread, because she is on food stamps and that's what she can afford.
I said NO, she can afford much better food than that crap, because fresh whole plant based food will fill her up sooner and more nutritiously so she'll naturally eat less eventually. She then thought about it and said she could stock up on canned beans at least, and of course groceries usually have weekly discounts on produce, even frozen produce. I said she can save a ton of money by not buying breads, crackers, snacks, etc and certainly leaving the meats and cheeses on the shelf.
The only way to combat the nutrition ignorance "out there" is to be as loud as everyone else who claims high protein is the way to go. I quote Dr. McDougall's statements to those people about what protein does to the body, and it's not pretty, but they need to know the truth. Did I convince anyone? I don't know, but I always add the addr for this website and encourage everyone to come read what he has to say, based on sound science and biology.
My sister-in-law said, "I'll look at it (the website) soon" meaning she will forget I ever said anything. I won't stop. I plan to buy copies of "The Starch Solution", "Maximum Weight Loss", and of course his cookbooks and send them to people who need to read them. MWL is awesome for basic nutrition science, and few people reading the first part of that book can claim he doesn't know what he's talking about. And if they claim it anyway, I'll simply ask how their present way of life is working for them. It's all I can do. Okay, it's not ALL I can do, but sometimes in-your-face is such a turn-off.
Robyn

[nayasmom]

*Sigh*
I posted on Sparkpeople's fb page about cross fit. I never heard of it but read a reference to it in one of these posts so I looked it up. I posted two links, one "pro" that actually advocated in part "this is not for anyone on a vegetarian/vegan diet" and "you are encouraged to consume lots of meat protein", and one about that rhabdoblahblahblah thing.
The backlash was immediate. I opined that this cross fit business sounded dangerous, and that I didn't find it at all appealing, and that red flags were popping up in my head. Another poster said that she does cross fit, it works for her, and that she felt I was pushing my beliefs on everyone, slamming everyone's choice of exercise, and I was rude. I answered back that I'm no more pushing my beliefs on "everyone" than she is by her promoting cross fit or high protein dieting or whatever, and I'm not slamming anyone's choice of exercise. I simply found two opposing articles about cross fit and presented my own opinion. I then said that I'm not responsible for her feelings of being offended if indeed she felt offended by my statements.
This is a lot like talking about the joys of being a heathen in a group of (organized religion name)s. As soon as you open your mouth about your unique or different or otherwise non-traditional whatever, people start getting all sorts of disgruntled and accuse you of pushing your beliefs on others or shoving your beliefs down everyone's throats. I beg to differ! I am doing no more than the preachers are doing.
You want your "Paleo" way of life? Great, welcome to it, more power to you, but I'm not going to be silent about what a crock of manure it is, either. After all, the Paleolithic Period spanned some 300,000 years, and earlier Paleo Man ate his beasts raw, and foraged for roots and plants and experimented a lot and died as a result most likely. Before farming, domestication of food animals, and cooking there were... well, roots, plants, and raw beasts. I don't think anyone could truly hark back to the real "Paleo" diet. I mean, really.
And I highly doubt even later Paleo Man used olive oil to cook with, or ate bananas. Whenever Paleo Man ate whatever he could find in the place he happened to be standing.

I'm not really going anywhere with this post today.
I enjoyed yet again a hearty lunch of split pea soup with baked potatoes, and about 4 cups of fresh spinach mixed in to wilt. Breakfast was a splurge, I had an avocado with my Spanish rice and salsa burritos. Have to say, my belly felt kind of weird after breakfast, so I might need to completely strike avocados off the list, at least for the time being. Having been overweight pretty much all my life, Dr. McDougall warns that I'm an easy keeper from the get-go, and that's pretty much my challenge from here on out. I am hoping that distance increases will eventually = weight loss increases. That would be so nice!! But I'll take whatever comes my way, and be happy for it.

Workouts are going nicely. I did a 2.25 mile route yesterday. Tomorrow will be my weekly "long run" and it's 3 miles. My breathing seems to be nice and even, I don't struggle on that first incline as I used to, and my legs don't feel like tree trunks at all. Of course it might be kind of slick today seeing as how we finally got some snow, and it's wet, and the road I use is not plowed at all in winter. I'll just wear my trail running shoes today. And bundle up.
Robyn