Navigating the Holidays - Let's share our Strategies!

[nicoles]

It's that time! the Holidaze. When advertisers, loved ones, friends, family people you don't even know run around in a "food daze" and come at you from all directions with SAD foods, sugary, fatty treats, fatty, sugary, alcohol-y drinks, and candy everywhere!

I have to say personally, I love the festivity, I love the glitz and lights and socializing. I really do!

But I don't love feeding disease with sugar, meat, dairy, refined flours (or for me personally, alcohol), or getting so off track that it's super hard to get back on track!

I want all the CHEER with none of the SELF DESTRUCTION. I have HIGH STANDARDS on both sides!

I bet I'm not alone.

So, I thought this might be a fun place to share our strategies - with no judgement! Everyone knows themselves and what they need to do and we are all (presumably) adults here.

I'll Start.

I am 100% all the time. I have a chronic illness and really, anything but that causes problems I can feel within days if not hours. So that's me!

My Strategies for common situations:

Feeling Deprived

Strategy:
I stay focused on what I GET to have rather than what I DON"T GET to have. I get to have pain free health, good sleep, energy, happiness and a trim figure. I GET to eat delicious foods that I love ALL year round. I have clear sinuses, no mild asthma, clear skin, clear mind and even emotions. WHAT A BARGAIN.
Back Up Strategies:
I have several compliant treat recipes that I could eat all year but I save for holidays/birthday etc so I feel like I am getting a treat! Some are elaborate and some are super simple but I do love them all and they DO feel decadent. I also allow myself a wee bit of extra nuts/seeds and dried fruit on the ACTUAL HOLIDAYS THEMSELVES. UNDER 3 OUNCES. But we all know how crazy rich those foods taste when we basically eat 10-15% fat in our diet. THEY ARE A TREAT.

Social Pressures

Strategy:
I pretty much follow Doug Lisle's advice from Getting Along Without Going Along. If you have seen it, I recommend it highly. I'm inclined to be somewhat confrontational by nature, but I do love many people who DO NOT respond well to that, and I want to have fun with them, so I make exceptions. I bring my own food to social or work events, when it's acceptable, or eat whatever I can there when I can't, or don't eat when neither work. I make sure to NEVER ARRIVE HUNGRY or EXPECT I WILL EASILY FIND COMPLIANT FOOD. I ALWAYS PLAN AHEAD. That's my jam.

When people are extra pushy, about food or alcohol, I say I have a medical condition (I do) and they usually leave it at that. Most people I love are well aware of this already, but I am always meeting new people and the new friends of my family and loved ones, so it does come up. AMAZINGLY the same person mocking you because our are abstaining from one thing or the other BY CHOICE will completely back down if it is for MEDICAL REASONS. (However, I usually hold this strategy for "emergencies" because this can lead to "experts" telling you exactly how you should heal your illness they have never hear of before. )

Boring Obligatory Work Functions

Strategy:

I work for myself, but the Huzz has one I go to each year, and I'm sure everyone knows how awesome THAT can be. Sure, with the right workplace and people it can be a blast or at least fine, but not always. The things that are hardest in my particular situation there is staying under the radar for not drinking (people seem to really be insulted at that). Cranberry or Pineapple Juice and soda water to the rescue! OR just soda water with a stirry thingy and a slice of fruit in a short glass. I guess apple juice could pass for whiskey, too....

Wanting to Snack on Sad Store Bought Treats

Strategy:

If I don't see them, I don't think about them. So, when we get them as gifts - in a bag they go, hidden in a cupboard to donate to homeless shelters or take to work to "share" or to give to others or just throw away, which I do as a last resort. (We have a lot of homeless people in our area. TOO MANY. Yes, I know that it is not great to give them unhealthy things but I personally thing a little treat goes a long way for people in bad situations. Sue me.) When the HUZZ has some around, he puts it in a place I don't go or get's things I don't like anyway.


So, that's all my secrets, revealed!

Anyone Else?

xoxo

[f1jim]

This is great stuff, Nicole. Couldn't be more timely. Every year about the end of February come the stories of binging and out of control eating and the toll it takes on many of us here. Some planning and forethought can prevent so much regret later.
Sounds like you have the holidays in control.
f1jim

[Kaye]

Its not something we have to worry about much as we are quite an anti social couple. We are self employed so no works gathering to attend, we spend the holidays on our own as my Mum won't come to stay with us (partly because we have big dogs and she doesn't like them and partly because of our food choices) so we pretty much please ourselves. We will be eating much the same as we do at any other time of the year and taking advantage of any free time getting out hiking in Dartmoor National Park with our 3 dogs. I will be making up a flask of homemade soup, some homemade crusty wholemeal bread and some blueberry oat bran muffins and that will last us all day. A stew or curry will be waiting in the slow cooker for our return then we will relax with a good book or watch a bit of TV. This year we are not going to be entering into the spend spend spend and eat eat eat merry go round but will be enjoying the things we love doing and getting back to nature - however cold or wet it might be

[amandamechele]

Thank you for sharing your secrets Nicole. You have some wonderful strategies.

One of my strategies is knowing when to bow out.
This weekend I was supposed to go to 2 dinner/dance functions. I have just gotten myself back on track and out of the pleasure trap so I knew that there would be just too much temptation for me to resist. I decided not to go to either of them. My husband is dancing solo this weekend.

[roundcoconut]

I'll tell you guys how I am creating the mindset, attitudes, beliefs, ideas and behaviors that I like best for myself, and then you can use those strategies in December or in January, or really anytime you want to.

My magic secret is that I practice and practice and practice ANYTHING I'm trying to get good at. What you practice, you become good at. With enough attention and repetition, you can be good at anything! Yes. You can be totally effing good at this, even if up until now, you've been practice attitudes and ideas that have kept you discouraged and unhealthy.

For myself, I have practiced thoughts like:
I just do best when I eat simple foods. I like to eat the same foods day after day -- this just keep life easier for me. I just like eating a lot of raw foods each day. I never really need to eat anything exciting -- I'm perfectly satisfied having carrots, apples and bell peppers as my default raw foods.

I like to say to myself:
I like how it feels to have a light body. My body feels light as a feather. I notice how easy it feels to buy the same foods over and over again, like every trip to the grocery store is another Groundhog's Day. It's really just fun for me to eat this way, and it's fun for me to feel sexy and hot and in a pair of low-slung jeans.
--

In short, I drill new ideas into my brain. Ideas about ideas. Ideas about behaviors. Ideas about beliefs. Beliefs about behaviors. I drill new emotions into my brain. I practice, practice, practice.

And I often get REALLY specific about my practicing when I'm up against a specific challenge. I recently went on a rampage of practicing all things related to drinking black coffee. I kept saying to myself (and journaling page after page of same): I like the idea of being someone who only drinks their coffee black. I believe that coffee's the perfect thing to drink if you like feeling sexy in a pair of jeans. Whenever i order coffee, I just sit straight down without needing to stop at the counter. I notice that I look really nice in a pair of tight jeans, and I think drinking my coffee black really has something to do with this.

I mean, can you see how I just go ON and ON and ON, kneading new thoughts / ideas / emotions / behaviors into my energy field? If you feed your body wonderful thoughts, they take hold, and they SERVE you.

I hope that can be of some use to someone, because it's really been a joy to get my body to its lowest healthy levels (where I feel fast, happy and energetic, and AND very light on my feet).

I will say that I sometimes see people who grumble their way through these boards saying, "It's so hard to..." and "I struggle to..." and "I can never seem to..." and WOW -- practicing for failure!

It takes much, much positive input to get new beliefs /mindsets / attitudes / beliefs / ideas to take hold -- so give yourself that. Weeks and weeks of reprogramming, because as the outcomes start to flow, they are worth it. When you notice yourself ACTING FROM the thoughts and behaviors that are at the ready, and then creating positive snowballs over time, you are becoming more the person you want to be, and that always feels really good.

Good luck with your holidays guys! Practice all the right ideas and beliefs and behaviors BEFORE the party, BEFORE the visit to your in-laws, BEFORE the unwanted box of chocolates arrives. (And KEEP practicing! Get better at your thoughts and ideas and beliefs.). DO this. You can thank me later!

[Vanilla Orchid]

I used to find this season overwhelming. I like a a good party, but not so many all at one time. Now, I do as much or as little as I feel like doing and that keeps me a whole lot less Grinch-like.

As much as possible, I try to keep to a normal routine of work and activities, and to spend time with people I enjoy when time permits. Food isn't generally a problem. I'm quite happy to skip work events if it means going to a restaurant where there is nothing I'm interested in eating. I see people at work on a regular basis and don't really feel compelled to socialize with them unless they are also friends. In general, I prefer to keep my work life and social life separate and distinct.

If I'm confronted with some kind of off-plan food and if it's something I really like, I'll eat it. But most of the off-plan foods are things I don't like much anyway, so, that's not a big problem.

One thing I do notice is that nobody really notices or cares what I do or don't eat or drink. Nor do I care whether they care. Most of us could save a lot of stress by paying less attention to what we think others must think. Most are pretty much focused inward.

[Chikiwing]

It all comes down to willpower.

No one is going to give you anything.

Champions Train.

Losers Complain.

[Quinda]

I always have an alternate plan. I also have great will power. At Thanksgiving I had planned to order from menu but eat at a restaurant buffet for the sake of others. Before it worked. They changed their policy to a limited menu this time. It was full of cheese and stuff I never touch. I declined and told them I'd have coffee only. I was not hungry due to sitting there watching the others eat ravenously. Wow does that ever take away ones appetite. There were people there who could barley walk to the food due to their girth but they kept returning like people on a suicide mission. I found it profoundly sad but enlightening at the same time. Normally I'm looking at my food and talking to those at my table but that time I quietly observed and was truly overwhelmingly thankful for everything! Christmas just might be a similar experience at a different restaurant. Other gatherings before the holiday will be abundant with all the wrong stuff but like NIcoles said, that is not food on that table, it is not edible, it is poison to me so I leave it there.

[Plumerias]

Its not something we have to worry about much as we are quite an anti social couple. We are self employed so no works gathering to attend, we spend the holidays on our own as my Mum won't come to stay with us (partly because we have big dogs and she doesn't like them and partly because of our food choices) so we pretty much please ourselves. We will be eating much the same as we do at any other time of the year and taking advantage of any free time getting out hiking in Dartmoor National Park with our 3 dogs. I will be making up a flask of homemade soup, some homemade crusty wholemeal bread and some blueberry oat bran muffins and that will last us all day. A stew or curry will be waiting in the slow cooker for our return then we will relax with a good book or watch a bit of TV. This year we are not going to be entering into the spend spend spend and eat eat eat merry go round but will be enjoying the things we love doing and getting back to nature - however cold or wet it might be

Oh, I didn't think anyone else was like us! I could paraphrase....... It's not something we have to worry about much as we are an anti-social couple when it comes to living in the RV and in campgrounds. We are retired and have no family members with whom we are close. Maybe, just maybe, we'll splurge and have pineapple plantain curry, a definite feast day dish, assuming we can find the ingredients. We'll go for a quiet walk locally, as going out during the holidays in the Disney World area is insanity, and the interstate is unsafe due to the volume of alcohol consumed. Then we'll come home and continue working on our travel plans for next year, while listening to the last of the holiday music. Now, hiking in a national park, that sounds wonderful.

[f1jim]

I don't think it's willpower. After 10 years my takeaway is you can't be successful with this program using willpower. Willpower doesn't beat the bodies cravings over the long haul. The training part i do believe. Making healthy eating a way of life is the only way to make this work. Getting through the transition to healthy eating does take some resolve. If you quickly give in to the first unhealthy bit of food you find this program will not work. Successive consumption of unhealthy food will keep you from your goal not move you closer to it.
If willpower were the key I would be in serious trouble. I have zero willpower. But I kept the crap food out of my house and out of my mouth long enough to make me immune to their attraction. It doesn't take long but it isn't always easy.
Holidays are a minefield that result in a lot of casualties to the program. It doesn't have to be that way. Careful planning and mindful celebrating will deliver us safely through the holidays.
f1jim

[viv]

I don't think it's willpower. After 12 years my takeaway is you can't be successful with this program using willpower. Willpower doesn't beat the bodies cravings over the long haul.
f1jim

Absolutely agree, I've had bucket loads of willpower my whole life, but it's not strong enough to beat the cravings. My strategy is just to stay away.

On Friday I attended a teachers' meeting. Slap bang in the middle of the table was a giant box of doughnuts. I was hungry, so yes I ate a big doughnut (but it's just a plain one I told myself). Within 10 minutes I had a horrendous stomach ache --thank goodness my body's warning system is loud and clear. So yes, I just have to stay away.

Viv

[f1jim]

I have edited my post. I have NOT been following this program for 12 years. I meant to type 10 years.
Sorry.
f1jim

[Chikiwing]

I don't think it's willpower. After 12 years my takeaway is you can't be successful with this program using willpower. Willpower doesn't beat the bodies cravings over the long haul.
f1jim

Absolutely agree, I've had bucket loads of willpower my whole life, but it's not strong enough to beat the cravings. My strategy is just to stay away.

On Friday I attended a teachers' meeting. Slap bang in the middle of the table was a giant box of doughnuts. I was hungry, so yes I ate a big doughnut (but it's just a plain one I told myself). Within 10 minutes I had a horrendous stomach ache --thank goodness my body's warning system is loud and clear. So yes, I just have to stay away.

Viv

Does everyone in your household eat plant based?

I'm the only member in my household who eats a plant based diet. So I see the SAD everyday at almost every meal. It's impossible to stay away. I share the table, just not the food. As rare as this WOE is isn't that typical? Plus, everyone is bombarded with food advertisements constantly.

Training is important to me. I think it should be to everybody. I do 5 miles minimum most days of the week. The last thing I want is to ruin that with a SAD meal very dense in calories.

[f1jim]

Chikiwing your situation is common. Most people will be eating very differently from their family and friends. I am fortunate to be in a two person household and we both eat strictly McDougall.
You can't get completely away from SAD food. That's impossible.
I fully agree it's about following the plan as closely as possible for enough time as it takes to control the cravings. Call that training if you want. But that's the way to beat back SAD!
f1jim

[roundcoconut]

I have edited my post. I have NOT been following this program for 12 years. I meant to type 10 years.
Sorry.
f1jim

That's hilarious, because the way I read this post was, "I've been eating SAD food for the last 12 years, not following this program at all. I'm a sham and a fraud. Love, Jim"

I thought we had a big scandal here!