A New Amy...

[♥ Amy ♥]

e-lyn-
That's so funny! I just 'found' these in my local store and bought one on impulse. I was SO amazed at the sweet and yummy taste I posted about it in the food topic. I couldn't agree more - I feel like I have been missing out on them for sure.

Thanks for the idea!

[CathyB]

Amy~ what a joy and pleasure reading your journal! Just remember you only fail when you stop trying!

For me baby steps did not work, it was all or nothing with one tiny confession.....my decaf coffee. I tried switching to tea and I thought someone was going to die, by my hands. One day I might get rid of the coffee but for now that is my one vice I have kept. I know some people would scold me for this but I need it for my sanity.

Do not eat anything that you do not like. You will set yourself up for failure. Don't like oatmeal??? Don't eat it! Surround yourself with found that you love and try to add some new things in to see if you like it. If you do not, never eat it again! I would never continue if everything I ate was not something taht was tasty and amazing.

Look forward to sharing our journeys together as I have a lot to lose myself.

Take care!

[JohnLarson]

Going out to eat seems to be the biggest challenge as far as oil is concerned. I make sure no oil at home and try my best to choose menu items while eating out that have little oil. This gets better with time. I also now limit most of my bread to when I go out to eat.

I think your priorities are good. The no meat and dairy (even ice cream), for me was not as hard as it sounded. The no oil and refined flours, well that has been harder.

Have you read The Starch Solution yet? I saw you ordered it. One of the things I took away from reading it was that I do not have to be 100% to be successful. I learned that from reading the journals also.

For me, this is more about what I can eat, not what I can't eat.

[♥ Amy ♥]

CathyB - Thanks so much for reading my journal & of course, for commenting. I means a lot to know someone is actually reading my thoughts and finds interest. A little hard to believe but, I mean that in a good day!

JohnLarson - Thanks for all your great comments both here and on your journal thread. I did read the starch solution and I passed it on to a relative. I think your point is awesome about not striving for perfection as we all know that inspires failure. I actually shared this wisdom with a friend last night. Also, thanks for the link to the veggie steamer, I've never tried that (obviously).

So, I've had a few really great days and one splurge meal last night. It's amazing what a difference the food really makes. Maybe I'm seeing success because that's what I'm hoping for, but I am really delighted with how much clearer my skin seems already. I've suffered with acne since the 8th grade. I won't go into the litany of things I've tried. Losing dairy has worked wonders for me in the past and again I see the benefits, just can't believe the improvement in a few days...again - maybe I'm seeing what I want to see...

I started a new job about 3 months ago, switched to a company with a Health and Wellness focus, previously worked in manufacturing. So, with that I am trying to get hip to all things wellness. I am now in a huge office building. Tons of companies, and people and a totally different feel than the plant I used to sit at. I'm now on the 3rd floor and today I took the stairs. I've done it a few times - always taking at least one break on the way. They are steep and with my purse and computer (and my body weight) it's a tough climb. There are 47 stairs in total - I counted today! YES, I was SO out of breath when I got the top. I am going to continue to take the stairs at least once per day. I leave at lunch to pick up my son and take him to the sitter, so there are at least 2 times for me to make the climb. Ultimately, I want to have taking the stairs be my 'normal'. But for now, I think once a day is a great start.

I officially booked my spot in the 5 day program in November. I am SO excited, but nervous and apprehensive too. I totally get that just going and listening/learning isn't actually going to change anything about my day to day life and choices. But I am sincerely hoping that it does a few things for me in terms of upping the stakes for me to change my behavior when I return. I got to spend a few hours with my BFF last night (rare occurrence since for the last 5 years we've lived across the country from each other) and I told her I was going to 'fat camp'. That's my pet name for the 5 day. I explained how that I know I am spending a HUGE amount of money and it will be a sacrifice. But that's where the positive pressure comes in. After I come home, how can I just squander the gift that was given to me? Also, my boss is aware since I asked for the time off before booking everything and she told me she's proud of me. She knows my desire to improve my health by reversing my obesity. How I respond will be my defining moment in this journey. Will I go back to what's 'easy' by choosing to not plan ahead, not cook and rely on fast food and what other people are eating? Or, do I put myself (thus my family) first and do what I need to do for me?

I think part of my struggle is that we are truly taught (at least I feel I was) that being selfish is wrong and putting yourself first is selfish. I love my husband, I love my son and I love and am so grateful for my new job. I want all those things to be a priority and to be well taken care of. So, how do I accomplish that while putting myself first? I think that's the eternal question and sheds light on some of the wiring that I need to learn how to unravel inside my head.

I think for me this journey is much more of a mental transformation than anything else. I know whole foods are best, I know fruits and veggies are awesome, I've done 'raw' and loved it - lost about 30 lbs effortlessly. But I have never, ever done anything that really stuck. I have never changed my life (or my lifestyle) to the degree that I am truly seeking.

I know I'm so fortunate that although I am morbidly obese (and the heaviest I have ever been in my life) I do not have life threatening illnesses. I'm not on any medication (part of my reason for choosing the 5 day) but I want out of this fat suit for good. I want to reverse obesity and never ever find myself there again.

There are several things that have drawn me to McDougall, the science, the ease, this board, the great success stories, the success in progress stories but at the end of the day I love starch. I love potatoes, sweet potatoes, corn, squash and I could (and have) made a meal of just those things many times before. I know I need to eat veggies too, but trying to focus on what I love at the moment and I for sure know its the starch. I sometimes worry because I really want to eat mostly starch and lots and lots of it, but I've read many times over here that it's 'not the starch' that's the problem. So, I am trying to keep that in perspective while love on the potatoes!

Thanks for listening!

[Norm]

Will I go back to what's 'easy' by choosing to not plan ahead, not cook and rely on fast food and what other people are eating? Or, do I put myself (thus my family) first and do what I need to do for me?

The day will come when eating this way is the simplest thing you can do. It's true! I spend much less time thinking about what I'll be eating for the next several days and much less time cooking than I used to. Hurry up meals? No problem. You'll develop your own quick and easy go-to meals. Have faith that it will get easier!

I think part of my struggle is that we are truly taught (at least I feel I was) that being selfish is wrong and putting yourself first is selfish.

I think many people struggle with this. I did at some point in life. I think when I started looking at things differently was when I got married and had kids. The two most important things for me was to be a good husband and father today.... and prepare to continue to be a good husband and father for the future. That meant some lifestyle changes on my part. Back then it mostly revolved around giving up the motorcycles and booze and start taking my employment more seriously. More recently it has been about taking care of MY health, MY well being, MY future... because I will not be the husband and father I want to be and my family needs me to be if I don't take care of ME along the way. Work towards this perspective for yourself and you'll find a better balance.

-Norm

[CathyB]

started a new job about 3 months ago, switched to a company with a Health and Wellness focus, previously worked in manufacturing. So, with that I am trying to get hip to all things wellness. I am now in a huge office building. Tons of companies, and people and a totally different feel than the plant I used to sit at. I'm now on the 3rd floor and today I took the stairs. I've done it a few times - always taking at least one break on the way. They are steep and with my purse and computer (and my body weight) it's a tough climb. There are 47 stairs in total - I counted today! YES, I was SO out of breath when I got the top. I am going to continue to take the stairs at least once per day. I leave at lunch to pick up my son and take him to the sitter, so there are at least 2 times for me to make the climb. Ultimately, I want to have taking the stairs be my 'normal'. But for now, I think once a day is a great start.

That's great!!!! Every step you make ais a step towards your health and ultimate goal! Awesome!!!

I officially booked my spot in the 5 day program in November. I am SO excited, but nervous and apprehensive too. I totally get that just going and listening/learning isn't actually going to change anything about my day to day life and choices. But I am sincerely hoping that it does a few things for me in terms of upping the stakes for me to change my behavior when I return.

Thats awesome and I am so super jealous!!! I really wish I was closer to the programs and won the lottery so I could go! I can't wait to hear about your experience there! Tell everything! Will be thinking of you those 5 days

[moonwatcher]

HI Amy--

I just wanted to stop by and cheer you on.

The day will come when eating this way is the simplest thing you can do.

What Norm says is absolutely true! I loved reading about your McDougall lunch when you were home sick. That will become natural. And congrats on your plans to attend the 35 day program in November! Wonderful!

You can do it!!

moonwatcher

[♥ Amy ♥]

Norm, CathyB & moonwatcher~

Thank you all SO very much for stopping in! I appreciate you!!

Just a quick check in...

I did my 47 steps today and have made great choices in eating. No meat, no dairy and very little oil. I enjoyed an awesome delicatta squash for breakfast.

Lunch was my version of a SNAP meal (a lazy man's version). Brown rice, corn, black beans & crushed tomatoes.

Snack was a homemade vegan granola bar I purchased at a hospital yesterday (here's where I allowed the oil) and a baked potato with a1 sauce.

Haven't had any caffeine by choice. I may cave on that - I still want to take it slow and not suffer too much.

Not sure about dinner yet - but thinking about hashbrowns.

Hope you all have a GREAT weekend! So ready to spend some quality time with my boy!!!

[gnadec]

I wanted to thank you for sharing your story and wish you well!! I'm looking forward to your report when you get home from the 5-day visit!!

[♥ Amy ♥]

Hey gnadec, thanks for stopping by!!

Since I just finished my first day of the 5 day program, I decided I should revive my journal. I am officially NOT worrying about spelling or grammar errors, so please excuse me in advance.

For starters - I am EXHAUSTED! Just getting here from MI was an all day affair. I got up at 4:30 am and 12:15 am ET now. Needless to say, did not hang out after Jeff's lecture to mingle - just couldn't hang.

At first I wasn't too excited. I was pretty much questioning my sanity, why would I spend the money, take precious time away from my family (especially giving up a weekend, sacred time with my 5 year old) to come all the way across the country when I could just read the books and watch the dvd's. I got here around 2 and the first lecture didn't start till 5. Major buzz kill - way too much time, but of course I didn't have anywhere else to go. On the way to the first talk I passed Mary in the hallway. That was it for me - just seeing her in person got me really excited!

I'm much to tired to go into more detail than that at the moment - but I am taking notes and more than anything just trying to soak it all in. Enjoy every moment knowing that the sacrifices my husband, son and other family is making for me to be here is a major investment in our future.

Now, I'm heading to vegsource to pick up Jeff's new dvd then it's seriously bed time. I have to be up early to get my blood drawn. Optional, but I wanted to do it for a reliable baseline.

Night night!

[CathyB]

How exciting!! Can't wait to hear more when you are ready to share!

[Norm]

Night night!

Night Night!


And keep us updated!


-Norm

[♥ Amy ♥]

Hey Norm & CathyB, thanks for checking in!

Just finished up Day 2 - and it's 9:43pm Pacific time. And I am beat!! Just as tired as yesterday.

Wow, great stuff and definitely really extra special to be here. I am VERY homesick and missing my son - but it's an honor to be part of this crowd.

Today we heard from Dr. McDougall twice, Doug Lisle and Jeff Novick. We also had a cooking demonstration by Colleen Patrick-Goudreau and I did some Yoga this afternoon (or tried to anyway).

My butt is sore from sitting so darn much - but my brain is overflowing with good information. After a day of info like this - it's almost hard to remember why I thought McDougalling was hard in the first place. The talks and evidence are astounding and it really is all the information in the books, dvd's etc. Dr. McDougall references the starch solution many times over in his talks and he even said that in his opinion its the best, most complete work he's done. He said he doesn't have a desire to write any more books after this unless there is high demand.

Jeff is funny and gets the night time, after dinner slot to keep us entertained. I was struggling tonight even though it was a great talk on Calorie Density. I got up at 5 am for my blood draw and that was way to early after my long travel day yesterday.

Famous McDougall saying so far is - "It IS the Food". I love that. Simple and basic, but at the heart of the matter it really hits home. I'm also enjoying meeting people and hearing their reactions. Some are long time fans, been here before and are now sharing the message with others. Others got dragged along as a companion, I think those are the most fun.

Dr. McDougall gave a talk tonight about dairy - he said it's on his site, you tube etc (aka: not new stuff) and it was very compelling. In his opinion Dairy is the most offensive and the number one thing we should give up - even before meat. This was eye opening and startling for me in a number of ways. Dairy has always been something I've caved on when the going gets tough or I get lazy. Much less inclined to do so in the future. Also, made me feel guilty again for not being able to have breast fed my son. After 5 years you would think the guilt would have gone away, but definitely not the case. It's always there - I couldn't make milk but I still feel as if I failed him and set him up for failure moving forward. It's a bit hard to shake that off and move on, but the past is that past - so I guess that's it.

The food is really good with a mixture of options from MWL and regular Mcd style. I haven't loved everything I've eaten, but I am trying to focus on eating what tastes good, not worrying or getting obessesive and stopping when I'm full.

I'm actually drinking a herbal caffeine free tea that I love and I hope the box is there in the morning so I can write down the flavor!

I am taking notes at each lecture, but I'm pretty sure I will never look at them. I'm doing it for a good friend who wished she could come with me. I'm overwhelmed at the thought of trying to re-create this for her upon my return, but she's my number one fan and actually willing to try McDougall herself so I am willing to do almost anything to have someone in my corner on this one.

All the speakers are SO thin and trim - kind of disturbing and inspiring at the same time. Just geniunly nice people. I've turned into a bit of a groupie asking them to sign my books. I'm just sorry I had loaned out all my McDougall books before attending. I may buy my 3rd copy of the Starch Solution just to get it signed. And I'm really wanting a picture with John, Mary & Jeff before I leave. Should've done it today, but hopefully there will be another opportunity.

Time to hit the sack! More tomorrow - NIGHT NIGHT!

[CathyB]

Wow Amy! Thanks for all the information! Once again I wish I was there and darn me for not winning the powerball because I would be booking one lol! Maybe one day he will have an east coast location and I could save for that.

I know what you mean about dairy. I craved that more than meat as well and it would be very very easy for me to backslide into a lacto-ovo lifestyle. I do miss cheese. I miss my cheese omlettes with my cheese and my fresh chicken eggs in the morining........ I love the Daiya replacement but it is not the same.

Do not feel guilty about the breast feeding. Both of my kids I tried breastfeeding and they also had soy formula since my husband is allergic to dairy. My daughter weaned herself at about 4 months. Only wanted the bottled formula. My son could never get the hang of latching on. Was in the hospital with him for a week so I used the hospitals industrial pump while there. So he only got a week of breast milk. Money was tight then and did not buy a pump. Even with breast milk, I mean I was not vegan then so I was eating dairy so I don't know how that works.

Hope you have another great day today!!

[♥ Amy ♥]

Just heard a great talk from Doug Lisle called, "Getting Along without Going Along" - I took some notes to share with Dissolution in his journal. Great ideas about how not to be argumentative or in your face with people. How to take the wind out of the arguments about protein and calcium and questioning what I am eating. I asked a specific question about my sister and Doug was really helpful.

Here's a picture of Jeff, Doug and I. The are so thin I look like I am the stay puffed marshmallow man...but then again I kind of am. So cool though!

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