LosingIt's journal

[LosingIt]

Went on a hike with my sister today. It was hard work, and really hot! I look forward to the day that hikes become easier! At many points I felt like it'd be easy to keep going, just my lungs catching up. On the way down I wasn't winded at all but my legs felt like jelly. Altogether it was a good experience and I'll try to hike at least every couple weeks, if not every week.

Last night I ate too much and too close to bedtime. It was good foods, but I shouldn't have eaten so much of them! I woke up not feeling very well (little bit of lower back pain, and slightly itchy eyes and stuffy nose) but I got over it more quickly than I used to. I had just been extra hungry. That carried over to today, so far I have eaten more than usual. All good foods. I hope it turns out okay! I'm not sweating it too much, just realizing that I'm extra hungry lately for some reason. It was better when I ate more fruits and veggies, but also, some days I would go to bed hungry. I know that's not something he says we have to do, but I kinda liked it. Maybe my hunger will just go in cycles like this though. It'll be interesting to see if it's reflected in my weight on Monday.

[LosingIt]

So, I decided to weigh Fridays to be part of the MWL group. I was up 1.3 pounds since Monday.

Must just be because I've been hungrier lately. It's discouraging, though. I want to be able to eat with my appetite. I should be able to, according to the MWL book. I haven't had any added fat. I have added veggies in almost every meal. I have weighed less at other times this year while eating more junk. 20 pounds less!

I know, I could eat more veggies, or stick to one starch (like Mary's Mini), or work out more, or, or, or. But I feel like I've done so well. I see many people here who don't exercise at all losing much more, I see coworkers who can't help but lose weight eating all sorts of junk, and when I'm this weight it's supposed to come off quickly! Everyone says so; everyone says it's easier to lose weight when you have so much to lose. But I've been working so hard.

[LosingIt]

The rest of the day was as hard as the beginning. I didn't plan well because I didn't have much time. I didn't run today but I'll have plenty of time tomorrow. I didn't eat many fruits and veggies. I was in a really bad mood most of the day. I spent a lot of time daydreaming about foods I could eat. I bought a package of Oreos but only had 2 and gave the rest to the teenage boys I work with that can eat anything. I feel a little sick. I almost went to another store to buy vegan ramen, but I didn't. I came here instead. I feel kinda hungry, but mostly emotional and a little bit ill from the cookies. Things didn't taste good today (except the cookies) and I was just mostly upset. Since I gained I can't believe that I can actually eat when I'm hungry, until full, and still be healthy/lose weight. And if that isn't true, I don't know how I'm going to stick to this WOE.

[to_our_health]

The rest of the day was as hard as the beginning. I didn't plan well because I didn't have much time. I didn't run today but I'll have plenty of time tomorrow. I didn't eat many fruits and veggies. I was in a really bad mood most of the day. I spent a lot of time daydreaming about foods I could eat. I bought a package of Oreos but only had 2 and gave the rest to the teenage boys I work with that can eat anything. I feel a little sick. I almost went to another store to buy vegan ramen, but I didn't. I came here instead. I feel kinda hungry, but mostly emotional and a little bit ill from the cookies. Things didn't taste good today (except the cookies) and I was just mostly upset. Since I gained I can't believe that I can actually eat when I'm hungry, until full, and still be healthy/lose weight. And if that isn't true, I don't know how I'm going to stick to this WOE.

Tomorrow is a new day. It's very discouraging to see the scale go up when you feel everything was done right. It just is. That's where this board is so great...for everyone who's been through it to come here and let you know it's just temporary, to hang in there, to start fresh in the morning. Everyone's body is different and for some reason yours may have decided to hold on to some weight for a bit longer. But I've read over and over in these journals that when you stick with it, the weight [i]does[i] come off. Sometimes people go up, get stuck for two or three weeks, get very discouraged but hang in there and then voila! The scale finally drops.

If it doesn't drop then it's helpful to list several days menus and people come in with suggestions to tweak things and often that does the trick.

Stay the course, this is for your health, it does work, it can take some time, continue finding foods you like to eat, enjoy them and be busy in your life...

[LosingIt]

Tomorrow is a new day. It's very discouraging to see the scale go up when you feel everything was done right. It just is. That's where this board is so great...for everyone who's been through it to come here and let you know it's just temporary, to hang in there, to start fresh in the morning. Everyone's body is different and for some reason yours may have decided to hold on to some weight for a bit longer. But I've read over and over in these journals that when you stick with it, the weight does come off. Sometimes people go up, get stuck for two or three weeks, get very discouraged but hang in there and then voila! The scale finally drops.

If it doesn't drop then it's helpful to list several days menus and people come in with suggestions to tweak things and often that does the trick.

Stay the course, this is for your health, it does work, it can take some time, continue finding foods you like to eat, enjoy them and be busy in your life...

Thanks for that, TOH. It helped me get out the door and go for my run this morning. Even though I had quite a bit of negative self talk during my run, it went by quickly and by the end I was feeling much better.

Doing well today and feeling okay.... I think I learned something about myself. A lot of this happened when I was kinda "feeling out" a new relationship. Last night that ended and I instantly felt a lot better. I didn't used to think that my weight was very emotional-- I mean, I knew I began (but only began!) to gain it at a time I was emotionally distressed but that period ended and I kept gaining. I thought by then it was really just "mechanical"-- eating too much of the wrong foods just because of addiction and lack of satisfaction. But this whole situation just the last few days has made me look at that. It's true I feel a lot better emotionally on high carb but I think I could've handled the small gain with more grace if I hadn't been distracted. Also, the whole "being hungrier" thing which probably CAUSED the gain in the first place was probably a result of being anxious. Or, there's the idea that I'm fat as protection against relationships... I never really believed that, but hey, maybe. Now I can buckle down again and focus. Until I look at another boy....

[LosingIt]

So, I've been on a bender.

I've spent enough money on food in the last 3 days to feed me for a couple weeks on healthy food.

All vegan, but all junk.

Now, I still have a lot of junk. Expensive junk. And my body hurts.

[LosingIt]

Doing better now! Up until breakfast yesterday I was still eating very badly. The rest of the day was healthy food and it felt so good. My body was craving fruit and starches! I got grapes and beans and rice, and now a big pot of "Mexican Fiesta" is cooking which smells great. And even with just 3/4 of a day of good eating, waking up was much more pleasant today than it was yesterday. My friend returned much of the junk I bought. The rest isn't really edible without the stuff he returned, but I don't know what I'll do with it. Maybe give it to my sister.

I'm not weighing myself... like, ever. Haha. The other benefits should be good enough! They are!

[LosingIt]

So, I kinda binged last night-- not as bad as it could have been (I didn't go out and buy junk food, but had some high fat foods, and too much food all around) but still pretty bad. All well. I felt like I ate a lot of approved foods yesterday but was still hungry, and it was late, and blah blah... I'm taken back to a time when I tried dieting all the time, and each day would start great and I'd binge at night. I don't want to go back to those times.

I'm just still not convinced that I can't overeat this way. I see plenty of people here losing slowly, not losing at all, and eating what seems like SO few calories to me. Not to mention my own experience of having gained. I know I can't restrict calories, I consistently fail. I just don't want to take 5 years to lose this weight. It didn't take me long at all to gain it.

I want that "sane around food" feeling I had not so long ago.

[LosingIt]

Sooo... I'm back. No scales. Excited. Excited to "eat boring" instead of "living boring" where I'm too fat to do the fun things my friends do! Vegetables, here I come....

[LosingIt]

Feeling better, OF COURSE!

I was eating frozen rice a lot, but got instant rice that's less than 1/2 the cost. Takes longer to make, but still easy-peasy. Already when I eat this way I spend a fraction of what I'd spend on food eating unhealthily. It's cool to find ways to cut it even further. Of course, normal rice would be even cheaper, but the convenience keeps me sticking to this WOE!

Got a BUNCH of beans, tomatoes and corn on case-lot that's happening now. That'll last me a few... days! No, at least over a month!

ALREADY fighting the urge to weigh myself, geesh, I need to find better things to do with my time!

[LosingIt]

Ate "off" yesterday. I don't know if the depression after is strictly physiological, strictly psychological, or a mixture. But man I was depressed. Still feeling it. Even though my body didn't really hurt (maybe that's healed past that point), my new symptom after eating wrong foods is major depression.



I used to think, I wish I'd never had my gallbladder out because the massive pain after eating fatty foods "should" have eventually trained me to eat better. Maybe this psychological pain will work the same way. I'm not all that hopeful though. The more recent physical pain, though nowhere near the level that gallbladder attacks were, didn't stop me.

[LosingIt]

Hm... feeling good today. My dad has asked about this WOE. He has Diabetes, has had heart surgery... lost some weight on Atkins long ago... I hope he's ready to eat this way. I just sent him a big email. He'll watch Forks Over Knives soon-- he found it on Netflix and added it to his queue. That's something.

[LosingIt]

Man I wanna weigh myself! What's up with that? I've only eaten healthily for like 2 days! So I know I'd just be disappointed, even though I probably gained a lot of weight and lost it again, I wouldn't know. I know, it's mostly not fat when that happens, but it's all the same in the number.... Must resist.

Working a lot this week, hope it turns out. Eating mostly beans and rice. The first time I was eating more potatoes and I think that was better (even less calorie dense). This time I'm just going for simplicity. I like potatoes best in the oven but that takes too long, so rice and beans it is (often with tomatoes a la SNAP meals, always with lots of veggies).

I haven't been exercising. I know that would help my mood a lot, and probably also my eating too. I've just been tired and sleeping in and working 6 days this week... excuses, excuses. I'll start up again someday. I'm not really sweating it (punny?). Eating well is a huge deal and quite the improvement for me. I know I could be exercising, but I also know that can be hard on my body in this state. Going for walks is what I should do. Running and stuff at this weight might not be the best thing. Maybe that's just an excuse too, but... my bones were hurting a few days ago... man, I feel old!

[joyfulmother]

Hi Mandi, my name is Becky and I am also on a weight loss journey. I have been leaning towards vegetarian for awhile and am now McDougalling as of today. I will keep up with your progress - maybe we can encourage each other!

Becky's Healthy Life

[Rosey]

If you get a rice cooker then the normal brown rice seems pretty easy too. Just not as fast.