Journal to Health

[connieg]

I did! Did you? I wish I could go this summer, but am hoping maybe to go next summer.

Good day today. Had a finger prick at work that showed my cholesterol to be 115. My "good" cholesterol was only 20, which is supposedly high risk (supposedly should be above 40 or something), but I wonder if that is accurate. Blood pressure was 105 over 72.

[StarchBeet]

oh, then I did meet you in Costa Rica...I'm 60 pound lighter now!! (Thank goodness). Cheryl, you and I had our picture taken together. Do you remember that? I'm Julie. Oh, you and I sat next to each other on the river rafting

OH, and Cheryl and her daughter are there right now!!!! I wish I could do it again but that won't happen for a long time

How embarrassing to get my J months confused. NEXT month they go to Costa Rica.

[connieg]

oh, then I did meet you in Costa Rica...I'm 60 pound lighter now!! (Thank goodness). Cheryl, you and I had our picture taken together. Do you remember that? I'm Julie. Oh, you and I sat next to each other on the river rafting

OH, and Cheryl and her daughter are there right now!!!! I wish I could do it again but that won't happen for a long time

How embarrassing to get my J months confused. NEXT month they go to Costa Rica.

Congrats on your weight loss, Julie! I didn't get started again after the trip, but hit it in January and have lost 48 lbs since then, so am on the right track. Wish I could go to the Costa Rica trip twice a year-what a boost!

[connieg]

Lost 3 lbs this week, so am happy about that. It would've been more, but had a little trouble last night at a social event. I'm an introvert and recently joined an outdoor social club as a way to meet people and be active. My friend joined with me and we went to a bbq/tubing event last night. There were supposed to be veggie burgers, but they were all out when I got there so I ate lettuce, tomato, onion, catsup, mustard on a bun and an apple. That wouldn't have been too bad if my friend and I hadn't made the decision to buy a pack of smokes. I recognize it for the juvenile coping mechanism that it is (that's why I started smoking at 16), but wish I didn't succumb to it so easily as an adult. 2 sprites and a half pack of smokes later I was hungry. We spent 3 hours on the water with a bunch of people we didn't know and didn't feel like we fit in with. On the way home we hit taco cabana where I had a black bean and rice burrito, which isn't horrible, but I could see oil in it. So with all that salt consumed last night I imagine my weight loss number is not as good as it would've been without it. The good think is that next Friday we are going to join the group to play volleyball. That is more active and not as anxiety-producing b/c it is so active. Also, you don't buy smokes to play volleyball!

Last Thursday I went to the vegan doctor. She spent almost 2 hours with me, which is a real rarity these days! I went to her b/c of the depression and anxiety, which has lifted somewhat over the past week and is almost non-existent this weekend. She ordered bloodwork and a sleep study (I have sleep apnea, but haven't had a study several years, so adjustments may be necessary). I am not sure how I feel about this doc. She is a nice person and I like that she believes in the McDougall program (and follows it herself). There are some things she differs with Dr. McD on (as do I), some of which I agree wtih and some I don't. For example, we both disagree in his beliefs about sleep and depression. She also believes that you shouldn't eat within four hours of falling asleep. This is a really difficult one for me, b/c I eat late and I like eating late. She also believes that you should eat big breakfast, medium lunch, small dinner and that you should NOT eat many small meals throughout the day. I prefer to eat big breakfast, several small meals throughout the day, and big dinner. Making the change to the McDougall Program was the biggest single change in my life that I've ever made. I feel like it should be enough. What else? She says it's a bad idea to eat while watching t.v. or movies. I know she is right on that one, but I don't want to change that habit right now, if ever. She is also very negative about shift work, which probably most doctors are. I am not currently doing shift work, but I will return to it within the next month. I've been on temporary assignment in a day job and I hate it. I prefer my other duties (on my night shift job) and I really do feel like a night person. I hate getting up early (and, to me, before 11 is early). Loving my job is more important that my circadian cycle. I have insomnia now, as a day worker, and I've been working days for 8 months. Lastly, she recommended this depression program that I can buy on web by Dr. Nedley (http://www.drnedley.com). I am an athiest and there is a "spiritual" component to it, so I don't know how I will feel about it. However, I did watch a 10 minute youtube video of Nedley and he did seem to use science to draw his conclusions, so I'm willing to give it a try.

[Broadbean]

Congrats on the three pounds lost! I am interested to hear about your experience with the depression program. I have struggled with depression for a long time -- one of the things I was hoping to change by McDougalling. My depression actually got worse for the first few weeks, but is much better now. So.... guess we'll see what happens in the long run.

Cheers!

[connieg]

@Broadbean: sorry to hear that you have struggled with depression-it is a challenge. So far some of the materials from the Nedley depression program are helpful and some are not for me just b/c there is some religious slant. However, it is based in rational emotive behavior therapy/cognitive behavior therapy, which is pretty solid. After reading some stuff I am being reminded of my negative self-talk tendencies and am working on it. Will let you know once I go through more of the stuff...

3.5 lbs lost last week and tomorrow is another weigh in. I feel like I did well this week, except for a minor peanut butter binge (straight outta the jar). The only reason I even have pb in my house is for filling the dog's kong. The smell is just so alluring. Too bad it is so high in fat. I think I made up for it today by walking 6 miles, but we'll see tomorrow. I got all my grocery shopping and cooking done today, too, which is nice b/c it means tomorrow is pure fun. It will start with a 3 mile hike and then maybe a movie.

So I'm pretty sure I have the most boring journal ever, so here is a funny facebook post I saw today (just to liven things up a bit): When my dog farts he blames it on me.

[StarchBeet]

Hey connie, your journal is not boring and its good to see you still working on eating well. You've done well for yourself. I had an almond butter/bagel binge this past week myself. I try to keep potatoes handy at all times and that helps when I'm busy. This Spring and Summer have me more active than I have been in a long time. Being lighter gives you so much more energy. My son got rid of the cookies and things he had around in my pantry and he laughed when I told him that I can't stand those sorts of temptations hanging around. I am eating a lot of fresh fruit as it is and I'm supposed to be on the MWL, or that's what I'd prefer. What I do and what I want aren't always in alignment. What's so sad is how much gathering with others is around unhealthy food. Now I have to invite people here...so please feel welcome to come visit sometime. We will eat very well. http://www.flickr.com/photos/28585497@N ... 631038242/

Last Thursday I went to the vegan doctor. She spent almost 2 hours with me, which is a real rarity these days! I went to her b/c of the depression and anxiety, which has lifted somewhat over the past week and is almost non-existent this weekend...I am not sure how I feel about this doc. She is a nice person and I like that she believes in the McDougall program (and follows it herself).

That's interesting. Right now I have no insurance so I don't even go to my own long term doctor. He's helped me through back surgery and various other things and I'm not sure I could even locate a vegan doctor. But, do you take her suggestions into consideration then make up your own mind? I'm stubborn like that. I kind of like that idea about eating more in the morning and less at night but I dunno how important it is. Maybe its more important until we get firmly into this lifestyle without too many hang-ups. My friends mother has diabetes and she sticks to three meals with no or little snacks. I sort of wonder if that's wise, but I'm not a doctor.

...sleep study (I have sleep apnea, but haven't had a study several years, so adjustments may be necessary)

Will that lessen or go away if you get closer to ideal weight?

I think your shift work is pressure upon pressure, indeed. However that's your job and you'll get to figuring out how to deal with it sooner rather than later, one can hope. I had always been a night person but this Spring, sort of starting back in Costa Rica even (since I would be AWAKE at 5:30 am every morning without an alarm), I have become a morning person and I get up by 6:30 to water the garden and tend to the plants. I am loving the sun and getting outside before it gets too hot. The lure and pull of the computer is always there, yet. So, things can change, just sayin.

I'd like to hear what you think about that depression program. I know that when I exercise regularly that I feel happier. When I did the Seagull Century http://www.seagullcentury.org/ I could feel the flooding of good feelings every day for at least a week after that. But I hope you find a way to navigate through those dark feelings as well as addressing your negative self talk. Both are big challenges, I'm sure.

Sorry to go on and on, but I wanted to get back to you, but I've been too busy, and tired, and sometimes sick.

You mean my dogs finally getting even since he's been blamed all these years (my dog is going on 14 this year---I'm going to take some pictures tomorrow and share them. I love this old guy!)?

[connieg]

Thanks for your comments Starchbeet! Yes, with the vegan doc I very much take what I can handle and either argue or ignore the rest. I got my blood work back in the mail and she had reviewed it. She marked my Vitamin D as low at 30.2, which from my reading is actually normal. Dr. McD recently wrote a newsletter article about how the threshold for normal is probably too high anyway. So this doc is going to suggest that I take a Vitamin D supplement and I'm not going to do it. If B12 was low then I'd do it, but it's not, fortunately. Everything else was normal, except my "good" cholesterol was low, but I don't really know what that means in the grand scheme of things so I'll ask her when I see her. Here's a weird thing-I had a finger stick cholesterol test thru work on a Wednesday that showed my cholesterol to be 115. Three days later I had fasting bloodwork done and it showed my cholesterol to be 153. I'm guessing that the fingerstick just isn't very accurate.

I do believe that exercise is an essential part of dealing with depression. The vicious cycle is that I feel pretty low energy so getting out to do the exercise is challenging. Even though yesterday I did 6 miles (walking/hiking) I did not do these miles with great intensity. Today I hiked 3 miles, but again it was not super energized. The Texas heat also saps the will a bit. That Sea Gull Century looks like great fun-will you do it again this year?

The sleep apnea could go away as I lose weight, but it might not b/c as one gets older the muscles lose some of their strength anyway. Even some skinny folks have sleep apnea. I'm sure, though, that it will at least get better to some degree with weight loss.

Well, I guess that peanut butter caught up to me b/c I gained a pound this past week. I'm trying not to catastrophize it. The hard part is that I don't totally understand it. If it made sense then I could say, "Okay, you didn't follow the plan so this is the result." Instead, though, I literally ate the equivalent of 5 tablespoons of peanut butter, which is probably about 600 calories. That shouldn't equal a pound gained, nor should it negate the perfection that was the rest of the week. Let it go and go forth into a new week.

[StarchBeet]

Well, I guess that peanut butter caught up to me b/c I gained a pound this past week. I'm trying not to catastrophize it. The hard part is that I don't totally understand it.

I know what you mean. There are so many factors that go into it. Bottom line is when trying to lose weight peanut butter doesn't have a place for us. Also, weight really isn't what's important. It goes up and down and if you're terribly attached well...maybe you learn something and if you take it as a warning when you're going up then you can stop yourself. But I get too obsessive and I just have to get back to simplicity instead.

I am going to try the Seagull Century again and I may do more than I have in the past. All I did last time was 40 miles. I took the first "intense" walk in a long while. I actually jogged some through the woods and jumped over trees. Oh boy do I need that lift because my old dog is getting to the end.

I know that I read something from McDougall about the "time" of getting your cholesterol measured and how it affects the reading. Sorry I don't have a link but those newsletters are treasure troves of information. I would guess the same about the finger stick, too. I agree with the Vit D situation. I think if you're walking then you're doing a great thing...keep it up!! I remember reading how Jeff says he prefers "intense" work-outs. I realize I like consistent ones (and i'm not consistent enough) and I have to be oh so careful about intensity because I did too much too soon after a back operation and I had to get another one. I cannot afford another of those!!

I am hoping that your apnea gets less as you exercise more and eat better and lose some weight. Can't hurt for certain!

So I hope your new days are full of promise and simple good eatin and everything else you want...

Here's the family and dog: http://www.flickr.com/photos/28585497@N02/

[connieg]

Been a bit stalled over the past month with the weight loss, but did lose 1.5 this past week. Am down to 190.5. I had been getting frustrated with the holding pattern and I knew this last week was going to have a couple of deviations so I aimed for just staying steady. The small loss is a bonus.

I've completed most of Dr. Nedley's depression recovery program and my assessment of it is not glowing. It isn't that there isn't some good information in it, but I just don't trust him for some reason. He presents scientific material, but doesn't qualify it the way Jeff Novick, Dr. McDougall, and Doug Lisle do, so it makes me wonder what the sources are and if the studies he quotes are sound. The other major detraction for me is the emphasis on God and a Christian perspective, but I recognize that that would be a plus for some folks. Finally, he's just not a dynamic speaker.

As for my personal plan to deal with my dysthymic state, I am exercising daily (in 100+ degree heat, so it isn't high intensity), seeing a therapist, and reading some cognitive behavioral material. My job is changing this week-I am returning to the position I had before (same employer, different unit)-and I anticipate this change will have a positive effect on my mood.

[sksamboots]

Hey,

I think exercise did wonders for my depression. I find it works best when I exercise first thing in the morning, before I start my day. I hope you find what you are looking for

[connieg]

Thanks sksamboots! I do think exercise is pretty magical when it comes to depression/mood, and I suspect it would help if I could increase the intensity (aerobic). The heat has made that more difficult, but I so much prefer to exercise outside than in a gym. I work a weird shift (6p-4a) so it's either before work outside, or after work in a gym (safety reasons). I will find my groove. I appreciate your comment!!

[connieg]

Weigh in 186.

This is day two of making more of an effort to exercise my body. The impetus behind this is my mental health. I feel like I've run out of options, and this is the only other thing I can think of before returning to medication. I've read some studies that indicate that exercise can cut the need for antidressants in half. Even though I have been exercising the past few months it has not been at an aerobic level. My current plan is to do 45 minutes of cardio every single day to get those endorphins (and whatever else) released. I am also incorporating some light weight lifting, but that is secondary. Yesterday was my first day at it and it was hard to make myself do it, but I really feel like it made a difference in my anxiety level. Here's to last ditch efforts!!

[Hamster]

I've read some studies that indicate that exercise can cut the need for antidressants in half.

This is also my experience, at my peak weight of 128.5 kg (283.5 lbs) I was on medication for depression. With weight loss and regular exercise the need for anti-depressants has disappeared.

If I might make two suggestions, firstly aim to increase the duration of your exercise rather than its intensity. Increases in intensity will come naturally, no need to force things and risk an injury. The other thing is that a little exercise done often is better than a lot done seldom. In other words 45 minutes per day is better than 5 ¼ hours done once a week. Your aim to do 45 minutes per day is awesome – good luck and don’t forget to tell us how you are going.


Cheers

[connieg]

Thank you, Hampster-that is good advice. One of the things I'm struggling with is my anxiety level and it seems that when I have a relatively intense workout (not really intense by an athlete's standards) the anxiety either lessons or is gone.

Today's weigh in: 186. I did extremely well this week with eating and I exercised every day, so am a little disappointed that I didn't lose any weight.

The exercise this past week seemed to make a big difference with my anxiety levels, so that is a plus. I was actually feeling genuinely good on Wednesday and Thursday as a result. Unfortunately, Friday brought some difficult news and my anxiety level has been high all weekend. Here is what the news was: My health insurance is denying my claim for a sleep study that my doctor ordered so I may be responsible for a $6K bill. They say it is out of network. The sleep study place (Global Sleep) contacted me to set up the appointment and the woman on the phone told me my insurance would cover at 100%. Of course, I didn't get this in writing, nor do I have her name. I already had the study done and I probably signed something about financial responsibility when they checked me in, but I don't remember and can't find the paperwork. It was after 5 p.m. on Friday when I found this out, so I haven't been able to call the company and find out what will happen next. Overwhelming.