Anna's Journal

[bunsofaluminum]

hi Anna

cool to see an old friend is still active going to look for others

[fulenn]

Hi Buns! I'm here, too!

Fulenn

[bunsofaluminum]

Hiya Fullen! LTNS

[SilverDollar123]

Hey Buns I'm here too! RAS

[bunsofaluminum]

Hey Buns I'm here too! RAS

RAS!!! hey there wonderful, wonderful!!!

[fulenn]

Hey, Anna! I haven't heard from you since Thanksgiving. Hope all is well in your part of the woods. I think of you often and your beautiful daughter.

Fulenn

[fulenn]

Hi, Anna! Just checking in to see how you are doing. I've been thinking about all of the things we used to talk about and have been missing it. Hope you are well!

Fulenn

[SilverDollar123]

Anna I miss you too! RAS

[Anna Green]

Hey y'all! I have missed you too. What a treat to see your messages! I will look for you to see what you are up to!

I came here because I just needed to journal. I hung out with my twin brother today and am very worried about him. He has heart failure. He agreed to eat the way these wonderful docs recommend so I spent alot of time talking to him about what that means and how to do it. I gave him grocery list and suggested recipes. Got him signed up for the facebook McDougall groups and had him order Dr. Esselstyn's books. I've also been supporting my sister and my student in eating well by making food and sharing. Maybe one day my family will say enough already and just do it. Sure would help us all.

I've been doing much better overall myownself. Off my bp meds though I'm not yet where I want to be at 110/70 or so. Also not taking prilosec or any of those things. My weight is slowly coming down....alot to go. Mostly I've finally after almost a decade and tired of playing. I have things I'd like to accomplish and deeply understand that won't happen unless I stay the course.

I'm sad in general. It's so fucked up what we do to ourselves and the cost individually and collectively. What we could do with all that money spend on disease.

The good thing is I have been less anxious and depressed lately...that always happens when I eat well.

I haven't been into journaling lately though I have participated a bit in the facebook groups. It feels good to be doing this right now though and perhaps I will do more. I am ever grateful for this site.

[SilverDollar123]

YES! Welcome back Anna!. Missed you. RAS

[kirstykay]

Hi Anna! It's so great to see your post! I'm back as well, and feeling a lot like you are right now. Just. Want. To. Do. This. Glad you're doing well and feeling better. Your brother is lucky to have you in his corner and leading the way to health! Looking forward to seeing you around here more.

[kkrichar]

Hi Anna, glad to see you here and doing so well. I hope your brother gives this a serious try. My husband has been doing this with me for nearly a month and it's getting easier for him.
He's also noticing positive changes in his health.

Kelly

[Anna Green]

Ras and the Ks, I'm so happy to see you! I read your journal Kirstykay! Yes Yes Yes! So what if it's taking us years to finally get here? Wish it hadn't but I know we did some harm reduction and hung around enough not to get totally lost. I can't believe how happy I am to see all of you. kk, you are married! Wow!!! I hear you voice over the years about relationships and I know you work hard for good relationships. He must be a special guy to have won you over! So glad he is on board because I know it will make it easier for you.

My bro seems serious about this. I'm trying not to overwhelm him. I wish we lived closer so I could give him food. I'm thinking about buying/making spice and broth blends and sauces for him to make it easier.

Now about me because being the care taker that I am I will use everyone's problems not to focus on my own. I'm still struggling some but the struggle is less and less. I seem to be settling in. I have been avoiding doing much for church or volunteering because this year is going to be about my health. I am cooking alot not just for myself but for others. I'm ok with that because it keeps me focused on the health. Exercise has been slowly coming. This weekend I dug up 2 flower beds and I'm sore as hell in some weird places. . oh yah and the regular beer after work? That has had to stop. I have realized I do that because I can't give myself permission to shut down and relax unless I am buzzed. I've been practicing being lazy without alcohol to spur me on. Nice, eh? I still will go to my seestor's and have martini's and watch Trailer Park Boys and such. I just know that alcohol can't be a regular part of my life. I'd rather eat food.

I've been listening to Chef AJ alot and I do things she recommends like veggies for breakfast. The other day though she said you should eat so many that you are full and have to wait to get hungry again for your starch. It put me over the edge a bit because I don't have that kind of time in the morn. So I've been eating alot of veggies throughout the day and for breakfast when I'm hungry often it's oats and a nice amount of greens or broc. I do see a difference in my cravings when I have those greens on board. Plus I like to think about bathing my endothelial cells (sp?).

My daughter is home for a repair to that former surgury in Thailand, if ya remember. It's today and I'm not real worried. Just making her eat good food so she heals better. Of course. What else would I be doing? i am making her congee and a kind of unchicken noodle soup.

Ok that's all I got.

[kirstykay]

Anna,
I'm glad the struggle is less. Taking time to nurture yourself the way you so easily and graciously nurture others is a beautiful thing. I am in a season of my life where this is possible, and yet instead of seeing it as a blessing, I tend to dwell on feeling lonely and isolated. It helped me to read that you are taking an intentional break from things to focus on you. Mine came about by a move away from all of my friends and family and at the same time becoming an empty-nester. I am learning how to be alone. I need to see this as a gift.

I'm interested in your thoughts on Chef AJ. I have been on and off of her program. I love her, but there is something that the restrictive nature of her plan triggers in me. I know we need vegetables, but then I hear Dr. McDougall in my head preaching the starch and I start to feel all confused. Good for you for being able to find the balance that is working for you. I'm working on it.

Anyway, glad to be back here and glad you're here too. Hope your daughter heals quickly!

[Anna Green]

Kirstykay. Thanks so much for the visit! I'm glad we are here. It's amazing the impact these relationships can have. I haven't done that well over the years...at least not as well as I could have but the experiences of people here keeps calling to me and giving me hope. I'm in a different place now than ever before. I think it's partly because I know the clock is ticking and I have so much I want to do.

I just sent my brother the Star McDougaller video of Jim's story. I'm so worried about him and I think he will identify with Jim.

Re: Chef AJ. Not sure yet how I feel. I adore her in so many ways and have learned so much from her. I just can't feel like I"m failing because instead of eating a lb of veggies and waiting till I'm hungry again to eat a starch before work, I eat a bowl of oats and veggies (maybe a 1/3 to 1/2 a lb). There isn't enough time to do it her way. And I don't want to be hungry an hour after I get to work and not have time to eat till the afternoon or till I get home that eve which happens sometimes. It just doesn't make sense to me. I don't overeat my oats and I get in a good bit of veggies with the oats or potato or whatever starch I choose. I like doing the veggies for breakfast and i agree that it helps me...less cravings and more satisfaction. I bring my lunch to work and will include alot of veggies then too. I'm in the practice of sitting on the couch in the eve and munching on veggies before the rest of my meal. So, I'm getting them in and probably more than 2 lbs. It's just the timing. And I eat often later than she reommends because I just can't always get to it earlier. I'm realizing that when I eat the right food I don't overeat. It's happened before but generally I'm fine.

I just had something wonderful. I made fries in the air fryer and had them with spicy bl beans with nooch. So so good. This was after my veggies since they weren't mixed in the beans.

My girl is healing. Things are ok.

I just realized I am typing with one eye opened because I'm so so tired. Time for bed.