Mary's weight loss ramblings

[MaryW]

This week hasn't been very successful. I went out of town for a few days. I didn't get as much exercise as I planned and my food plan was pretty much out the window! I got to the gym today for the first time in 5 days! I can't believe how much I missed it. I only did the elliptical for 30 mins. I figured since I hadn't done it for a few days, I shouldn't jump right in at an hour. I couldn't resist sprinting for a bit though. I maintained 6 mph for a minute, then jumped up to 7 mph! I was quite excited about that.

On the food front, I found fresh asparagus on sale (spring is here at last!). I also got some shredded carrots as broccoli to make slaw, and I finally found shiritaki noodles. I read about these soy noodles in the Hungry Girl cookbook, but I've never been able to find them til now. Ironically, I could never find them in Asian grocery stores, but I found them in a regular American grocery store. I haven't tried them yet, so I don't know if I will like them.

[MaryW]

Work was very stressful today. I'm in a bad situation that I need to get out of! I dealt with it by dipping in the candy jar. Very bad. But I had broccoli-carrot slaw for lunch. very tasty! I made it to the gym for a bit. I got on the elliptical and just felt SOO exhausted. I only made it for 30 mins. I got on a stationary bike for about 15 mins to give me a bit more aerobic work. I missed BOTH my weight lifting class AND my yoga class this week! Not a good week.

[f1jim]

Why do you have a candy jar?
f1jim

[MaryW]

Yes, the candy jar is at work. There is a never ending supply of candy, cookies, chips, soda, you name it, at work. It's every food addicts nightmare. I know it's a matter of planning. If I have food with me--potatoes, fresh fruit, whatever--then I won't be tempted by the junk. it's the planning part that I am struggling with. Have struggled with for a long time.

I'm trying to get to my exercise. I was taking a weight lifting class and a yoga class. I missed THREE yoga classes in a row! I've finally gotten back to yoga, but now I've missed several of the weight lifting classes. And I was sticking with the elliptical machine. It was my lifeline. But I've been eating junk food lately and not getting much sleep, so when I get on the elliptical, I am wiped out. I'm struggling to do 30 or 45 mins when i was doing 60 mins just a few weeks ago! It's amazing how quickly things go downhill.

I've been really busy this week, so I haven't been to the gym since Saturday. But tomorrow is yoga and gym after. I seem much more able to get to the gym on the weekends. Work just sucks up all of my time during the week. Have I mentioned that I need a new job?

[MaryW]

By the by, my ticker is TOTALLY wrong. I've gained a few pounds this past month. But it's just too depressing to move the ticker up. I'll just wait til I get back down there.

[MaryW]

So many people are positive in their journals, but I just need to vent. This will be my whiny place.

We don't have a break room in my office, more like a break "area." Just a mini fridge, microwave and a cabinet for food, dishes, etc. I was standing at the counter, snacking on some baked red potatoes today, looking at the mounds of junk food people had brought in to share. I was so disheartened, disgusted, discouraged, etc that I decided to make a list of all the bad things.

*halloween candy
*candy bars
*caramel popcorn
*Ritz bits with cheese
*microwave popcorn (full fat)
*Pringles
*Doritos
*fudge stripe cookies
*gold fish crackers
*Chex mix
*Pepsi
*Lindor truffles
*sugar babies candy

Looking at all of that stuff made me feel overwhelmed. This was about the time last year that I stumbled in my weight loss. There are always piles of junk available at work, but people are bringing even more stuff for the holidays. Candy for Halloween, loads of baked goods and candy for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I can't be strong. My past performance has already proven that. I have to be prepared! Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes!

[janluvs2heel]

So many people are positive in their journals, but I just need to vent. This will be my whiny place. Looking at all of that stuff made me feel overwhelmed. This was about the time last year that I stumbled in my weight loss. There are always piles of junk available at work, but people are bringing even more stuff for the holidays. Candy for Halloween, loads of baked goods and candy for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I can't be strong. My past performance has already proven that. I have to be prepared! Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes!

Mary, just because you stumbled last year does not make you weak. You are stronger than you think. If you like sweet potatoes, try those as well. Sometimes the little bit of sweetness helps. I agree, though, the holidays are hard. So much stuff & if you dont eat, people get all offended. I just dont care anymore. I say no thank you & dont even look at it.

Your whining is welcome. I used to think that it was so unfair that I ate sweets, etc & gained weight while someone else eats them & stays skinny. They may not gain weight but they get the other stuff, we just don't see it until it is too late. Then we hear about it, bypass surgery, type II diabetes, etc.

Hang in there & keep eating your spuds!!

Jan

[MaryW]

Heh, I like that. I don't have will power. I have won't power! And girl power! And potato power!

[bunsofaluminum]

oh, yes. Keep those potatoes around. Cold baked potatoes are excellent traveling food. They can be eaten out of hand as you're driving down the road...like a donut! ha! I have several in my lunch box at all times. If I get at all hungry, I munch one. Can't afford to get hungry with those stupid evil goodies all over the place.

you go! and listen to Debbie. She's smart.

[MaryW]

I went to a workshop today for work. We were short on time, so my coworkers and I ate at the restaurant in the building. I only think I the menu I could remotely eat was a house salad: lettuce, a few carrot shreds and two cherry tomatoes. I ordered 2 salads, cuz I was SO hungry. Comments from my coworkers when my food arrived: "Those salads look so big!" "What a nice fresh salad!" Um, OK, the salads were not big (especially for 5 bucks each) and the lettuce was limp and slimy! I had some baked potatoes out in my car, but I was too embarrassed to go out and get them. Most people I know don't carry food around with them--unless it comes in a cellophane bag or a candy wrapper!

Tomorrow some friends are taking me out for a belated birthday celebration. I looked at the menu online. Pretty much the only thing I will be able to eat is salad, again. But if I don't want to go to a certain restaurant, or I order "special" meals, I'm being difficult. (sigh)

[sksamboots]

Mary,

It's your money. You are paying for it and pull that potato out and eat it!! I've done it, it does take time to get adjusted too. It did help that my co-workers encouraged me too because they realized I had been eating different. Your doing great. Keep that head up

[janluvs2heel]

Mary,

I stick a little container in my purse, filled with potatoes. One time I took my mango/peach salsa so I could put it on my salad. I didn't say a thing when I reached in & poured it on my salad. Made lettuce a little more tastier. Noone said anything to me & if they had, I would have told them to shut up. Those tiny potatoes make it easy to stick on your plate as well.

Who cares what people think & yes, I agree with Debbie, be difficult!!!

Jan

[amyla51]

Mary-
I think one of the hardest things we face is eating out. Our friends order this yummy looking gooey, cheese covered food, and all we can get is a sad salad! I know when it has happened to me, I have had to fight back the tears!
I agree with Debbie and Jan and others. Carry something in your purse to add to your salad, if you know that will be an issue. I often carry a small container with cooked black beans and shredded carrots. Most restaurants that sell baked potatoes will be happy to sell you one with nothing on it, or with salsa. Also, if they have a salad with chicken and cheese, ask them for the same salad with none of that on top. You should get it at a reduced cost also. Remember that YOU are the consumer. If they don't make you happy, you won't be back. I have only found one place in my town that said they could not take the chicken off my salad (Panera Bread) and I haven't gone back.
So, stick up for yourself!! bring some baked tortilla chips to work so you can avoid the candy jar. Remember, you know what everything in that jar tastes like already. You CAN live without tasting it again!
Good luck and keep going!

Amy in NH

[MaryW]

Well, here I am, starting over. I crawled into a bag of potato chips 6 months ago and I just came up for air. I got on the scale last weekend, and I had gained back of the 50 pounds I lost, plus a little more! Eeek! So I am back on the straight and narrow. Since I recommitted Monday, i have lost 8.6 pounds! I'm sure most of that is water weight because of all the salty chips I was eating. But I will gladly take it!

I'm feeling much better. More positive. I lost my mojo for a while and just COULD NOT seem to stick to the plan. I wish I had rediscovered my mojo BEFORE gaining 50 pounds. But it doesn't do any good to dwell on that now.

Since I've only been back on the plan a few days, I'm feeling very fragile. We went out for a work lunch yesterday to a Mexican place. At first I thought I would skip it so I wouldn't have to worry about what to order. But I have been hiding quite a bit since I've regained this weight, and I have to get back out in the world. So I went and ordered refried beans, rice, and a plate of lettuce and tomato. I was a little miffed when the beans came with cheese on them. Why do restaurants have to garnish everything with cheese??? If it's not cheese, it's bacon bits. Or sour cream. Or chopped egg. Or SOMETHING I don't want, but never even thought to ask about. Anyway, I scraped off the cheese and moved on. It was tasty and super cheap. And no one commented. So that was one hurdle dodged.

Now I have to go to the belly of the beast. I have to beard the lion in its den. I have to face the situation that knocked me off the wagon last year. You may remember the incident last summer when my chair collapsed while visiting a (very thin) friend's house. I was so devastated after that mortifying accident that I completely gave up on following the plan and exercising. I had worked so hard and lost 50 pounds. But I was still morbidly obese. I still wore plus size clothes. I still broke chairs. I've been steadily gaining weight since then. That same friend has been asking me and asking me to come back over. Why would I want to revisit the scene of my defeat (and humiliation)?? Maybe she wants to show me the reinforced chairs she bought? Well, I finally agreed to visit her again next week. I am FREAKING OUT. But I refuse to find solace in a bag of chips. But I will be worrying myself to death until then.

And finally have a reliable internet connection. Yay! So I plan to be more active on the boards and keep myself on track. I really appreciate all of the nice, supportive people here!

[janluvs2heel]

Mary, welcome back. I am so glad to hear you are back.

I have missed you & wondered what happened to you.

Hope things are better with your job.

Jan