Ready to get right.

[Jazz Clarinet]

I just joined this site in the past month and have mostly just been lurking. I'm loving the idea of a journal here, specifically for this topic so that I can write without fear of judgment from others (mostly the 'Ya gotta have protein!??!' crowd). No need for me to go into that one, here.

I quit eating red meat, chicken and fish almost a year ago, and suddenly found my body running like it should (sparing you the TMI details). So I am never going back to eating meat. However, I have still struggled over the past few months with emotional eating, or disordered eating, reaching for the sugary or fatty items. As a result, here I am in my late forties with a much older-looking body and a good extra 25 lb, which I need to get rid of.

I'm one of the (sadly many) women who went through the 'count all the calories' nonsense of the 80s and 90s, and fell into a disordered relationship with food as a result, gaining back the pounds and more along the way. After the past three years of making a conscious effort, I think I am finally free and clear of the urge to control my food and count things. Counting calories, fat grams, carbs, etc., just send me over the edge and out to the store for junk food.

I have had a recent run of about three weeks that seemed like I had caught and was riding a thermal wind, like the birds do before a storm. I was eating WFPB effortlessly! My body was righting itself effortlessly! My mind was calm, and finally free of the food-struggle. It shouldn't be a struggle.

Unfortunately that little spurt was broken (probably by PMS and work-related stress/depression) and I lapsed back into anguished eating (best way I can describe it).

Well the time has come for me to do this for myself, to honor myself and to follow through with this commitment. And really, all I need to do is eat all I want of these health-giving foods until I'm no longer hungry. It's pretty simple really. I have become much better at regarding all my comfort and junk-food as non-food items.

I do need to watch out with sites dedicated to a specific way of eating though, as I find people's daily food lists triggering. I am trying to get to the point where I can see these food mentions as ideas for what I can eat, not desperate proof that we are being 'good' or 'bad'. I have to stay away from the philosophy of 'good' or 'bad' foods as it trips something in my head that sends me off the rails. I don't understand it, can't reason my way around it, just need to avoid it.

So I think I may use this space for brain-storming, and perhaps a little extra accountability to myself.

I'm ready for my body to do what it knows how to do already: heal itself. My part is giving it the correct nourishment.

[Jazz Clarinet]

LOL. My journal is so popular it's sinking like a brick!

I forgot to mention that I am allergic to rice, sensitive to wheat (asthma, edema, ulcerative colitis), and soy scrambles my brain (brain fog and flu-like symptoms). Oh! I'm also hypothyroid of course. So soy is a very bad thing for me. I seem to do ok though with a fine balance between corn, potatoes, chickpeas and black beans. I will need to look into other starch options. I am ok with small amounts of quinoa but I can't eat it like rice in a bowl, for example, as it too brings on those flu-like symptoms. I also have to go easy on the nightshades as they make me feel like all my joints locked up. Potatoes are ok in moderation (1 small one a day), but tomatoes and peppers are trickier. Did I say I was only in my late forties?!

It's interesting here to read of other people's similar food reactions, and why simply eating any conventional plant isn't doable for a lot of us.

I hope that I can do well enough over time with the remaining veg that it gives my stomach time enough to heal, and perhaps I will be able to eat wheat again without too many problems.

I have to add though, that when I go back to Europe for a visit, the wheat products there do not make me sick. I believe there is something in the US flour that's upsetting me.

So...I'm on my third day of eating properly and am starting to feel the energy come back. I will need to go to the grocery store today to stock up on proper lunch foods so that I'm not starving when I leave work at night. Grocery shopping isn't quite such a drag if you feel like you are looking for and buying little bundles of energy for yourself.

[rhubarbtriangle]

Hello.
Even if you get no comment, that does not mean nobody reads - or cares.
It sounds as though, despite your challenges, you know what to do and are motivated to do it. That's the basis of success, right there!
You may be right about the wheat flour.
"I have to add though, that when I go back to Europe for a visit, the wheat products there do not make me sick. I believe there is something in the US flour that's upsetting me."
When I visited the US a few years ago, the bread - even good bread - disagreed with me. Here (I live in England) the bread is fine for me.
Keep going, and keep us in the loop!

[Jazz Clarinet]

Thanks for the reassurance! It's true. I have read plenty without commenting!

Thank you so much for the reply, though. And that's good feedback about the wheat products. There is an "English" shop near here that imports things from England, so I may go buy some of their flour (albeit probably three times the price), and make my own bread and see what happens.

I love your username. Did you ever see that old Eric Sykes and Harry Secombe film, Rhubarb? So funny. It's actually up on Youtube now.

Forgot to put my weight. Last week it was 170lb. I need to be 145 to 150. That's about right for my frame. Any less than that and I start to look like an alien (I'm tall).

[Jazz Clarinet]

I know I'm Blabberfingers here. It just really helps me to have somewhere to type it out. And knowing that others may read it helps me focus more on the thoughts that spark the writing.

I can tell my 'upper spare tyre' is deflating. Yay. My waistband isn't as tight as it was last week. My pants/trousers are hardly falling off yet though.

I have to stay away from the scales and only dare get on them once a month or so. I think that's plenty. Besides, I can tell from all the extra weight while exercising, and how my clothes fit, whether I am getting smaller or not. The scales are so fickle and demoralizing. I have edema issues occasionally, that can add or lose 5-8 lb overnight. So not a good representation of fat loss at all.

I have not yet gone into a new-recipe frenzy, so I will need to do that soon. The weekend is good for that. Finding things I might like and making tons of it for the week ahead.

I need to get back into the habit of making sure I never even have just one mealtime where proper food is available, where I am forced to either miss a meal or buy fast-food. So based on that I think I will spend my lunch hour grocery shopping.

[lmggallagher]

Hi JC:

I too am intolerant to some of the foods you have listed and I have to say I agree with both you and RT that the wheat in the US is different and not "healthy" for many of us. I also have this intuition about several other things that may have been so modified for taste or shipping convenience here -- that they are not working for our GI tracts.

I don't have ulcerative colitis as you do - I am so very sorry you suffer with this - but I do have IBS. I was given a hint by a Star McDougaller here to check out the low FODMAPS diet from Australia's Monash University. This was developed by the Enterology Department there and many people are having very good success with it for IBS and Colitis.

,There is also a wonderful phone app from them that explains the whole approach. Essentially some foods contain various saccharides that can cause problems. I have found in one group of saccharides that all of the foods are problems for me - and my life has been much better since eliminating those.

Just last night my best friend complained that her IBS came completely out of remission - so I listed the fruits that caused me the problems last summer. Sure enough she'd eaten a couple of those items (cherries and nectarines) the day before - but had not for over a year - when not ironically her last issues had come up.

Anyway ,I thought I'd mention this as i will be keeping track of your writings here as our problems are similar in some respects.

Best of luck with this WOE - Michelle

[Jazz Clarinet]

Oh thank you so much for the comment and info, Imggallagher! Yes, yours was one of the journals I had read (but I didn't comment! sorry), and felt somewhat comforted that I'm not the only one tiptoeing through the minefield of plant-based foods that are actually not okay for us.

I have a friend who is doing the FODMAPS thing and swears by it. I will look into it at some point when I have gotten this part of the process down and feel a bit more like narrowing things further. Thank you for the suggestion! It all helps, and it's especially useful coming from someone who has been through it!

Luckily, as long as I avoid (USA) wheat products, my UC stays away, and I never did go the steroid route for that. And I can probably get away with ONE piece of bread in a span of about 4 days, but any more than that and it starts off the avalanche of reactions.

Yesterday I think I was getting a message from the universe not to weigh myself, as when I dragged the scales out from under the cabinet and brushed away the dustbunnies and hairballs ( ), I found that they were not working. Oh drat! It's ok though. I know my waistbands and belts are already looser this week so that's good.

[rhubarbtriangle]

Yes, I'd definitely say that was a sign not to weigh yourself!

[lmggallagher]

Hi JC:

Glad the UC is pretty much just foreign wheat-based. I am so glad you have explained that here - as I have friends now that are finding they can no longer eat wheat and many other grains. Other than the GMO issues we have I am not sure what is happening over here with our food supply but I think changes have put many people into the food intolerant class of folks and its so sad.

I completely understand about not investigating the FODMAPs now, if you know your specific issue already. That was a tool for me to consider given to me by our friend here Nicole and when the time was right I dipped into it - I just try to pay that forward if it might be helpful to someone else . Elimination diets are hard - this is not an exception. at least if you do look into it you have friend their that can help you.

Best wishes to you - Michelle

[Jazz Clarinet]

Thanks Michelle! A friend on another forum somewhere also brought up FODMAPS...and you know I heed signs (see scales, above) so it's worth looking into!

The scales started working again, so I dared to get on them and did lose 2 lb last week. So yay for that.

I have started also keeping a loose note (nothing strict so I don't trigger myself) of what kinds of food I am eating, because I tend to skip on the fresh veg and fruit too much due to convenience or time constraints. So this is a good check list for me to remember to eat a salad at least once a day.

But I did not succeed in researching recipes, buying the groceries and making the food for this week so I am kind of playing dangerously here. I need to go ahead with that because it's too easy to slip back into old terrible habits.

[Jazz Clarinet]

I had a lot of refined starches yesterday, so my aim today is to have much more gut-friendly meals. Give the ol' intestines a rest.

[zumacraig]

Thanks Michelle! A friend on another forum somewhere also brought up FODMAPS...and you know I heed signs (see scales, above) so it's worth looking into!

The scales started working again, so I dared to get on them and did lose 2 lb last week. So yay for that.

I have started also keeping a loose note (nothing strict so I don't trigger myself) of what kinds of food I am eating, because I tend to skip on the fresh veg and fruit too much due to convenience or time constraints. So this is a good check list for me to remember to eat a salad at least once a day.

But I did not succeed in researching recipes, buying the groceries and making the food for this week so I am kind of playing dangerously here. I need to go ahead with that because it's too easy to slip back into old terrible habits.

Just keep it simple. I do a starch and a veg then fruit for desert or snacks. It' is really hard the first 1-2 weeks. After that, dealing with cravings is a lot easier. Other snacks I've been using are whole wheat pitas, Wasa crackers, whole wheat pretzels.

Keep it up!

[sksamboots]

Keep on keepin on!

[Anna Green]

Hi! Some of my favorite things are easy. I can be a lazy cook. Sometimes I throw veggies with pasta sauce and water or veggie broth in a pot, add frozen onions and peppers, frozen garlic cubes or powder, beans, corn, soul seasoning, herbs, etc and eat on that for days. Beans and greens are my latest favorite. Love big butter beans, and cabbage with a good unchicken veg broth and the aromatics. When I feel like cooking it's usually on Sunday and I make a few things for the week. I actually chop and such. Anyway, when you don't feel like it, don't. Just have an acceptable easy thing ready even if it's McDougall split peas soup cup over a potato.

[Jazz Clarinet]

*Sneaks back in to the journals*

I'm ready to recommit! While scrolling, trying to find my journal here I spotted some other great journal titles, such as "Lost count of how many times I've restarted", and "Progress, not perfection". Excellent, thank you. I do relate to both those statements.

I have just done another sweep through of my kitchen and removed my comfort food staples.

Anyway, I have been a binge-eater since I was a teenager (three decades). I am triggered by restriction. So as long as I don't restrict myself, or somehow start thinking I have restricted myself, I should be able to make this work. So I have to go about this very gingerly. I can't 'forbid' myself certain foods (so I am ok if I am choosing not to eat them). I don't want to eat meat of any kind, so no problems there, but I do love dairy products and creamy sweet foods. I'm allergic to rice and sensitive to soy and gluten, so I am somewhat limited and can't do what a lot of you do here.

I am going to try to make it 60 days to start with. I don't understand how 60 days flies by in the blink of an eye, yet I can't do a measly 60 days of eating right. Obviously the goal is to find my groove and just keep on with it indefinitely.

Oh! I also can't make this about weight loss or looking pretty, because those make me binge too (long story). But I do have plenty of health reasons to do this. I will weigh myself tomorrow just for a reference for later. I am now in the 'overweight' category after having been a binge-starve dieter in the 'normal' weight category for my height. I want to avoid some of the health issues my mother has had, and I already have some that she never had. I can tell my blood pressure is creeping up, whereas it always used to be very low.

I'm a 5 ft 10 female. 48 years old. Soon to be 49. Middle aged spread, junk food, sitting at work all day and perimenopause are turning my flesh into sacks of saggy oatmeal and I don't recognize my own body any more.

I love food, and my aim this time around is to just love eating all this great stuff. As much as I want. And my aim this time around also is to steer myself into finding new meal ideas to make this all workable. I find I get very bored with the same foods all the time. I'm sure I'm not alone in that. Having food allergies doesn't help.