How to manage social life eating this way

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How to manage social life eating this way

Postby Alycia 123 » Sat May 08, 2021 9:39 pm

How to manage social life eating this way ?
Alycia 123
 
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Re: How to manage social life eating this way

Postby MINNIE » Sun May 09, 2021 12:46 pm

Simple.

You are a free human being.
You - and nobody else - get to decide what food goes into your mouth:).

You can eat what you want to eat, and don't need to be influenced by social pressure.

If people want an explanation, tell them briefly that you are changing your diet for health reasons. That is all they really need to know.

Then change the topic of conversation and move on.

(If they don't ask, no reason to tell them).

In practical terms, You don't have to choose between eating for health and appeasing other peoples' feelings, or going hungry at a social outing.
OPTION A:
you can bring your own food to a potluck or other social occasion. Share with others if they want to try it, eat it yourself if they don't.
OPTION B:
Eat your own favorite food at home before going out, if option A is not feasible.

Don't worry and don't make this harder for yourself than necessary. You will probably find that most people don't even care.
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Re: How to manage social life eating this way

Postby curcubit » Mon May 10, 2021 9:19 am

Hi Alycia,

I agree with everything Minnie said.
I would add I find being proactive very helpful.
I do alot of research online to understand what restaurants/venues my husband and I can enjoy and when a social opportunity presents itself I will suggest options that work for us. Our friends understand and try to accomodate our choices, and typically they are ethnic restaurants with lots of choices (we live in a major urban area with every cuisine imaginable).

If friends really want to go somewhere with no choices for us, I have politely declined, no hard feelings.

Thanks to Covid, most social life has revolved around outdoor patios at brewpubs sometimes with food trucks (that allow dogs!). Again, we champion venues that accomodate us....have noncaloric/nonalcoholic beverages and allow us to bring outside food. I bought a stacking stainless steel tiffin, some bamboo cutlery and use a furoshiki...a japanese gift wrapping cloth for any tupperware I use. I bring all manner of salads/bowls with grain and beans. IT does mean sometimes I am eating cold food in the winter outdoors, but that is something I am willing to do rather than eat animal products or fried food. And we actually found two foodtrucks with WFPB options that are healthy.

Before Covid, we also entertained at home alot and made it clear the food would be plentiful, but it would be WFPB. I was always fine if someone wanted to bring something as a side dish for themselves not compliant, as I have been similar accommadated when I wanted to bring WFPB dishes to share to someones elses house. I think being gracious helps. I find people love coming to our house as we make interesting food: moroccan, persian, indian, jamaican, greek, etc. Just no animal products or fats. And they dont have to cook or clean up afterwards...bonus for them. Likely it helps our friends are open minded and tolerant. If your friends are more rigid, maybe it is time to expand your circle of friends. Look at Nextdoor or Craiglist and see if you can find a WFPB group with meetups.

I can understand it would be more difficult if you live somewhere that had alot fewer choices. IF that is the case, maybe look at your situation in new eyes. Dont dwell on the things you are avoiding, but concentrate on all the new things you can introduce your friends too. Be a pioneer. Maybe master a few recipes in a new cuisine and introduce them to it...or organize an international potluck monthly where you pick the country, research compliant recipes, and delegate a dish to each person to bring.

Preloading is key if you go to someone else's home. I dont expect others to serve me a totally WFPB meal, so I typically eat a big salad or bowl of soup before I leave, and bring a side dish to share plus a nice bottle of fizzy water and maybe some interesting fruit like passionfruit, dragonfruit, etc....definitely a conversation starter. Most people can manage to make a simple whole grain like brown rice or quinoa or fat free beans, so if they ask what they can make for me: I tell them that emphasizing no added oil or salt.

Or shake things up and socialize around events that dont involve food. Museum visits, walks, hikes, bike rides (you can bring compliant snacks if necessary). Game or movie night where guests arrive having already eaten dinner. Invest in some non-alcoholic drink fixings. This is expensive but fun: https://www.seedlipdrinks.com/en-us/. Poured over ice in a fun cocktail glass with a real lemon twist or mint spring and it looks like you are drinking like everyone else.

COvid has taught me, social interaction is paramount, and I crave that more than I do meeting people for a fat laden meal at a typical American restaurant.

Hang in there, it gets easier. Inevitably you will make missteps while socializing, but they are just learning opportunities.
Curcubit
"One cannot pick a flower without troubling a star." Aldo Leopold
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Re: How to manage social life eating this way

Postby f1jim » Sat May 15, 2021 9:15 am

Another angle on this topic is to ask the question.....
Ho do I manage a social life with heart disease, or diabetes, or other chronic condition.

I certainly understand the concerns about fitting in socially when you choose to limit your consumption of certain "food like" items. Honestly it can mean the loss of social eating friends. This has happened to me. However it has also meant the discovery of new, healthy eating friends, and the beginning of life long friendships we would never have made. New doors mean new possibilities, both positive and negative. I can assure you that a social life with better health is imminently preferable to bad health with many friends. Chronic disease puts a damper on EVERYTHING!!!!
f1jim
While adopting this diet and lifestyle program I have reversed my heart disease, high cholesterol, hypertension, and lost 54 lbs. You can follow my story at https://www.drmcdougall.com/james-brown/
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