I'm still here, and still kicking.
Super simplified my meals, to rice, spinach and beans. For one thing, it's what I have in the house, and there's no grocery money right now, so I'm eating what I have.
Secondly, it's simple.
Plus which, it is highly portable. Just put things in a container with some seasonings (usually garlic powder, vinegar...today, I made 321 dressing with smoked paprika added...YUMMY!) and haul it along wherever I need to go.
I'm also eating mindfully, which slows me down so I'm eating less.
Between meal snacking...I bought a big bag of pretzels last week and munched them here and there on my drive home, a few days last week.
Oh...over the weekend...huh...talk about emotional eating.
On Friday, I took a nosedive and damaged my hand. I was pushing a wheelchair around outside, just for fun. There is a bumpy section of the parking lot that is fun to go over...however, when I came to that place with Ms T, suddenly the wheelchair tipped all the way backward, until it was lying on its back...my hand was under the wheelchair handle, knuckle down, and everything skidded about a foot, with my hand under it. Ms T was just fine. didn't even phase her, but I was rather freaking out...
the ring I had on my finger ended up embedded in the flesh (this is called "ring avulsion" and it's VERY scary looking in person, though I wasn't too bad off, comparatively) and my middle finger had a deep gouge along the side.
long story short, I ended up at the workmed ER, getting cleaned up and stitched up, with a swollen hand and pretty worn out. Both the ring injury and the gouge needed three stitches each.
My plans for the weekend: to deep clean my kitchen and start culling my stuff to simplify, to scrub the basement floor where the cat peed on it, and maybe to do some yard work...those plans went out the window and I spent Saturday sort of dozing in my easy chair, and when not dozing, watching movies or reading, and eating.
Peanut butter and pickle toast is TEE riffic comfort food.
Sunday I did a bit better. When I stepped on the scale on Monday
and since then I've adopted the super simple mono-diet I describe above. And not only that, I haven't stepped on the scale again.
And the hand injury wasn't the only reason for emotional eating. I've been going through a LOT recently...looking back in my journals, i can see it's been pretty much one thing after another for about five years, but there's been a concentration of things recently which have me working hard on my inner life. God is walking me through a lot of things, and I'm clinging closely to Him in all of it, and He is good.
so, if I eat emotionally, so be it. If I am a compulsive/addictive over eater, so be it. I'll work on it, but first things first. HOWEVER, I can choose, and I have been for the past few days. Thank goodness for two years of experience with McDougalling, for I haven't gone berserk with SAD foods...just higher fat, or richer...calorie dense... whole foods.
So, yeah, I'm still around. At work all internet is blocked...but that's okay, I''m going to be moving on, not in order to have a job where I can dink around online when I should be working, but in order to have a job that pays well enough so I can afford internet at home.
Which brings me to the main reason why I haven't been interacting here as much, and that's the CNA class I've been in. Just a few more days!
*gulp* more transition. More change. *gulp*
Lord, lead me to the perfect job. Whatever's next, lead me through it into "a place of abundance" and set my feet upon a broad path of peace. Amen.