Discussion Board

Man, I haven't journaled in a while! I have been so busy at work, and with DH out of town for a few days DD and I have been working every night to clear more old junk out of the boxes, trunks and closets of this house, in anticipation of us starting to think about moving to Oregon after one of finds a job there. I only have like 25 minutes all told to get to the McD boards, and reading is so much easier than journaling!

About my incredibly slowed weight loss... I'm so close to the goal I set, I'm beginning to wonder if I've already achieved my true goal weight!? It was 132 at Weight Watchers back in the 70's. I have no idea if this is a good weight for me or not. I mean, I feel wonderful, even though I'm not at the goal I set yet. Should I post a success story, before and after pictures? I'd love to be a Star McDougaller, but now I'm having doubts. I felt more confident while I was losing, but now I feel -- how did Nettie put it? -- not "amazing." Many people have posted about the fact that losing consistently is a great phase, and everyone comments on your progress and you feel special, and then starts the living every day at your new weight and size, and that's harder. I feel like I've slipped right past my opportunity to be a star McDougaller, and that I made a foolish goal that the Wii Fit told me to. I have so much excess flesh in my belly and thighs that when I look down, I still see the same old fat me. It's just standing up in clothes that the 130-pound me shows up--but I don't believe in her! Who the heck is that? I'm feeling a little confused in this new body that I've got, because it's really an old used body. Don't get me wrong--it is so wonderful to run up the stairs every day, to do physical work for a couple of hours and not tire, to think nothing of walking on the glacier all the way to the end point and back. But I guess I can't tell whether I need to wait till I get to my 124 weight to feel like I am there. I wouldn't change the way I eat or anything, but...come to think of it, what would I change? what do I think I'm waiting for?

The new guy at work confided in me last week that he has lost 100+ pounds this last year--he's way younger than I and had bad diabetes and they removed his stomach (!?) so now he eats very little. He was so sincerely interested in the McDougall diet, what I eat and don't eat, and he asked for the website, for his wife. I don't think he could eat the way I do, because he can eat almost nothing. He drinks Ensure and stuff like that. But he is also trying to get to a new low weight, and we both seem to share that strange feeling like it will never quite happen, or something.

Oh well--maybe I'm just feeling in a slump because of the slow losses these past couple of months. It feels like a very slow torture! Maybe this can express how it feels--if I were descending a mountain trail, I could feel level when I got to the bottom. I would still walk around and stuff, but I'd be no longer carefully climbing down. Well, if I am at a good goal, I could consider myself at the bottom of the trail. Am I still descending, or am I on level ground? It's not as easy to tell as if it were a mountain trail!

Hey frozenveg,

You have done amazing. One thing I always say, I want to be able to maintain my weight loss without struggling. If that means my goal changes, then as long as I feel healthy & it is fairly close to the goal I set, then that is where I will stay. I am tired of struggles with food. Losing a few lbs, then gaining them back & more. That is not what I want to do anymore. So when I am down close like you, I am going to be making that decision as well. It has been so long since I was even close to my goal of 132, I am just playing it by ear. I picked that number randomly, since the last weight that was even close to that was many years ago & it was around 145.
I doubt that losing another 5 lbs or so is going to make that much of a difference on your stretched skin either.
I remember when I was in high school, & even going into my 20's, I would always get dressed, then look in the mirror, ask myself, do I look fat? Yes, I always did, even though I wasnt'. It is hard to get over that stigma. I think we have to learn to look in the mirror & love whoever looks back at us. I have had to learn that this person deserves good things, too. Fat or thin!!
I would love to read your story. You are so close, who cares about a couple lbs. Be proud of yourself & what you have done.

Yes. Right now. Please?



I don't know because I have not been in your shoes yet. But maybe you need to change your thinking to being in the Happily Ever After phase? And, does it matter if you are still losing or not? Your body will settle in where it needs to be.

Would it help if you knew that there are many who are wishing they were where you are now? Including me!

Sometimes it is hard for ourselves to know what our ideal weight is.
When I lost from 250 down to 125 with TOPS. I decided to put my goal even lower never making it. That was years ago.
Also takes a long time to really see ourselves small. I remember being in a large mall with mirror post. walking toward one,thinking someone way going to walk into me. Took me a while to realize it was myself. Also looking at clothes in large ladies size and asking the clerk if the pants came in different color. She looked at me strangely and asking if I was looking for myself. Sent me over to the petite size 11s.
So I say, yes lets have a success story and enjoy where you are now. If you loss more, enjoy. But, don't sweat a couple pounds.
Sorry for the long post.

OK, I've decided that I'm at my goal. 132. For now, at least, the body is staying in this range and not budging down. We are going to San Diego for our anniversary on Sept. 1 (the anniv. is Aug. 31), and I will be seeing my brother, and DH's 2 brothers and sister. I am preparing for questions and comments. I don't quite know what to expect.

I am also very afraid that I will begin to regain now. I have to get used to being at this weight, and I feel like for a while at least, I have to watch every day to make sure I am not getting overconfident and gaining it back. I have no basis for staying at this weight! I know if I stay on plan it should be inevitable, but I have an irrational fear of gaining. I also have to think about how to think about what I am doing now--I'm not "losing weight." I'm just living!

I know exercise will be a big part of toning up all the flab I have left, which is part of why I think I'm at goal. If the tummy and thighs had disappeared the same way the butt did, I'd have to weigh 10 pounds less, but it's like an empty purse--it still weighs something! I really don't know what exercise can do--it will firm up muscles, but does it really make anything go away?

But I have motivation to look good in San Diego, so I'm on a track. 17 days--I will be tracking what I eat & what I do.

Breakfast: 1 cup (dry) rolled oats with 3/4 cup cherries
Lunch: rice and frz mixed stir-fry veggies
Snack: 3 tiny red potatoes & a bunch of grape tomatoes, and red grapes
Dinner: the last of the cauliflower SNAP that was not very tasty, probably with ketchup
Exercise: 20 minutes of the Crunch Core Workout

The audit field work starts today, and I have to spend my spare time explaining in the financials where we went off-budget and what we can do to be better next year. What an icky thing...I was so tense last week, preparing for the audit, I totally forgot that we had been invited to our very good friends' home for a nice dinner and wine they brought back form Oregon! They called at 7 pm, when I had just gotten home--but DH and I had totally forgotten about it anyway!

Guilt is just flowing out of me....

Oh well.

Yesterday DD & I went to the store--they had a gigantic sale, and clothing, jewelry, etc. We spent a bunch of money, but I got sweaters for $6, etc--it was great! And everything I bought was in size SMALL! I thought the first was a fluke, and then they all fit! Amazing--I have never worn that size before (and I know vanity sizing is the reason, but I still feel all gloaty!)

Congrats...I'm so happy for you.

Frozenveg, CONGRATULATIONS!! YOU DID IT!!!!!! YOU SHOULD BE VERY PROUD!!!

I think if I make it to my goal, I'll always have to work at it, but I never thought I'd lose weight again, so this diet is incredible!!

Thanks, Gypsy and Simoncat! I don't think it has sunk in for me yet; I feel strangely cool about it, partly because I really thought I could achieve the 124 goal. But it I have been at and around this weight for over two months now, and it's not a bad weight, and dang, if this was my goal when I was 26, why shouldn't be a goal for a 61-year old?!? Besides, I have a long experience of motivating myself by "giving up." When a task looks really overwhelming, I struggle at it for a while, and then declare loudly, "I will NEVER get this done!" Then I plunge right back into it and finish it. If something is lost, same thing, I search until I'm sweaty, then I say, "That's it. It's gone forever." And usually, I do find it fairly soon after that. I think I get myself all bound up and tense or something, and giving up releases the tension and lets me get on with whatever I had to do.

Whatever the reason, I think it will come to me in a little while that I should be excited, and get a testimonial put together for the testimonial thread. I'm also waiting till I get the photo part together. I am so clueless on the photo thing, I know I put a before photo in this thread a long time ago, and totally forgot how, but doing it is the easy part--the hard part is getting photos on this laptop, which is not the one we sync our iPhones to, or anything. Also, I have to ask DH to take a new after photo of me--I have one from maybe April, but I've lost at least 5 pounds since then, and besides, I'm wearing a jacket and scarf and hat (we were freezing at a backyard fire at our friends' house!) My before pic that I want to use has me wearing my ubiquitous fleece vest and turtleneck--and the after photo should, too, I think. I have another photo at work--no idea how to get it home and on a computer I can use (I tried attaching it in an email but it just sits there like a word document). The photo from work is me dressed like a pirate for Talk Like a Pirate Day two years ago; I have no idea what I can wear this year...I should seek out some pirate-y clothes at a thrift store! (The scarf will still fit! )

Anyway--16 days left to San Diego. I ate the exact foods listed yesterday. Today I did about 1/2 hour of exercise--I walked 1.5 miles with Leslie Sansone, a bit farther than I have ever gone with her before! Now that it's dark in the morning again, I can use the front window as a mirror so I can check my back alignment and see if I'm doing the moves right--it's kind of fun!

For food today, I will have: 1 cup rolled oats dry with 1 cup frozen cherries; brown rice and frozen stir-fry veggies for lunch, snack of 2 medium potatoes, grape tomatoes, raw cabbage, and grapes (all separate--not a salad! ), and for dinner I'll make more rice and try the stir-fry veggie I found at Costco yesterday,

Oh man! Speaking of potatoes and Costco! I went the "other" Costco last night, which usually has lots better stuff than the one on my way home, but the potatoes were ALL moldy! It smelled disgusting! They only had golds and russets, no reds, and I couldn't buy any potatoes! So we stopped at Fred Meyer on the way home, and they had some--not a lot, but at least sort of fresh. I found 4 yams ($1.79 a pound) that didn't look terrible, and it just killed me to spend $1.29 a pound on plain red and gold potatoes! They are 69 cents a pound at Costco, and usually are ten times better-tasting, too. Oh, well, maybe it's the very end of a season and we are getting ready for the newer crops, who knows. I know the apples have been incredibly bland lately--I have never gone so many months without an apple before! But come September, there will be better ones, I'm sure!

Dang--long post. Sorry. Better get to eating and making everyone's lunches (mine & DH's, that is--DD makes her own.

I just wanted to say--it's not "if" you reach your goal, it's "when!" You will do it! And yes, we will still always have to work at it, but it's so wonderful to be this weight and working on it, rather than the top weight. I have been working on losing weight all my life, but this time it has actually gotten the desired results!

Congratulations Frozenveg!!

I can hardly wait to read your testimonial. And am glad that you re-adjusted your goal, too. Dont worry about maintaining your weight, you have already been doing that. Just keep doing what you are doing.

You have reached your goal > This is fantastic news. I'm speechless

Thanks, Jan and Sksamboots! My mind is still blown. I've decided I'll wait a few weeks before starting to work on a testimonial. I just want to make sure it will stay off--it's so hard for me to believe.


I'm also feeling a bit subdued because here I am living with DH and DD, and they are trying but not losing, and both obese, and I feel like I'd be bragging to ask for help with pictures or anything. I am trying to be considerate of their feelings, especially DH who has expressed his upset with me no longer having "good" food around, and that whole emotional tangle. I'm going to take a while to think about that...

Meanwhile, it's 15 days to San Diego!
Exercise today was minimal--Wii Fit yoga, Half Moon and 2 Warriors. Time just speeds by and I don't know where it went!
Food yesterday--I didn't have the rice and stir-fry for dinner, and I only had one potato (the gold from FM--incredibly creamy and yummy! Weird--most of their potatoes have had no flavor at all). Today I am taking more rice, and trying the Costco frozen stir-fry veggies, and will have the same at dinner. Snack will be grapes, cabbage, carrots, tomatoes again, and breakfast, as always, oatmeal--with cherries!

14 days to San Diego. Exercise: 21 minutes (!) of step on the Wii. Dragged myself--the last was harder than the first.

Food yesterday--didn't have rice/veggies for dinner. Had 2 potatoes and a side salad at Wendy's, with ketchup. Food for today: oatmeal and cherries; rice & stir-fry (Microwaved) veggies with balsamic dressing, cabbage, tomatoes, carrots, grapes, and a gold potato for a yummy snack. Man I'm dull, and I love it! Dinner--if I come home before 8--will be more rice and probably mixed veggies for variety !

If I cared, I have lost a pound since Monday--I weighed 130.8 this morning. However, nothing counts but Friday, so I'll see how the body wants to work it.

Audit week is hell week--it has been tremendously stressful, and I need a new chair--I have a backache halfway through the day and it never goes away! I need to figure out what kind of ergonomics I need.

FV- your such an inspiration I too have an office job and my back hurts some days. My chair is an older ergo but isn't great. You should def get a nice ergo chair, so worth it for your back!

Thanks, Beansnrice! Any suggestions on what kind of chair is ergo? Should I be looking in the $800 range (this IS Alaska), or can I find something in the more reasonable $100-$200 range? I'm using an inflatable balance cushion, that I can sit on, or put behind my back, to fill in where the chair goes out instead of in. My other alternative is to go home at 1 pm every day, when the back starts to give out! Or work that half day and walk around the office the other half (I'm second in command now, so someone has to be there & be in charge!)?

Ah well! 13 days to San Diego. Got two short-sleeved blazers yesterday at Penny's for $5 each! Woot! And size SMALL! I know it's vanity sizing, but My Golly! I don't ever recall buying something in my LIFE that was size SMALL!!!!! And I can fasten them in front!

My weight is 129.8 again this morning for the first time in a month, so not a new low but a second-time low! I did 16 minutes of Wii Fit exercises of all weird sorts, ending with the 5-minute step. Sheesh--I have no balance skills at all! I keep trying, though. The problem with balance is if you can't do it, you can't practice doing it--on the Wii, I mean--it gets annoyed with you if you put your foot down. It recommends that you hold on to something if you need to, but then your scoring is all messed up!

So, food. I never even had my potato snack yesterday. The traffic was bad--accident on the highway, so we stayed in town & went to Penney's; I got home at 8:45, had a glass of wine and went to bed.
Today's food will be the same as yesterday, except I am going to take a yam, too, and I think I might eat them both (gold and yam). If I have time. I also get full a lot more quickly some days recently, and so I eat a lot less.

So--the glass of wine was for the audit being over! Yay! Now I have weeks of works to do to get the financials and notes perfected for them, get the FY12 budget set up in 12 months and loaded into the software, and get the new tracking systems in place. Life is never dull in the financial world! First task: write notes trying to explain how we ended the year so badly over budget, when up until April, it looked super good. My boss & I have spent a week trying to figure it out--depressing.

Well, it's Friday--let's see what fun the day brings, and hope for a nice weekend!