Discussion Board

kk, hope the run went well. You sound good. I'd bet on your success that's for sure.

Thinking about you today...sounds like you had a great weekend...here's to a great week! I'm rooting for you!!

Hi KK

I just dropped by when I saw the title of your journal...you should know that there is at least one other who is on a very similar journey. Now to read up on your posts...and I'll try to keep up with this. I have a feeling you will be very encouraging to me. *sniff* *dab*

Thanks Anna and Kirsty. I am doing great. Day 4 and I'm eating oats and blueberries for breakfast. It is super yummy. I didn't think I liked regular oatmeal so I would only eat the instant brown sugar and maple oatmeal. When I decided to cut out sugar I abandoned oatmeal entirely in favor of Bob's Red Mill oat bran. I like that but have had really painful arthritis in one of my fingers and thought I'd try gluten-free. That eliminates the oat bran. I planned to switch to potatoes but I was too tired after my 8.4 mile run yesterday to prepare anything. Anyhoo, long story less long, I had a bag of Bob's Red Mill gluten-free thick cut oats in the cupboard and decided to try that this morning. LOVE it!!!!

I have a massive salad and a couple tacos on tap for lunch. I made a big bowl of pinto beans (made from dried beans!) and brown rice and chipotle seasoning to last a few days. I'll add salsa, mild banana peppers and corn tortillas to make tacos. My salad has mixed greens, tomatoes, mushrooms, red, green, yellow and orange bell peppers, zucchini, yellow squash, cucumber, radishes, cauliflower, kidney beans, a few green olives and dried cranberries. I had the salad yesterday without the olives and cranberries and just didn't like it that much. My goal is to eliminate them entirely but I have a long work day ahead I didn't want to give myself any excuse to not eat what I brought. I didn't put much in the salad so I think I'll be OK.

Dinner will be potato pizza!

The scale is still tucked away in its hidey hole untouched. I'm amazed I haven't missed it that much. Especially after yesterday. I followed the food plan and ran and spent most of the day cleaning because I have a friend coming over tonight. If ever I would think I deserved a big loss it would be this morning. Despite the fact I often gain weight after long runs because of muscle edema I still think I should lose. If I don't lose Queen Baby throws a big stinky fit and demands garbage in retribution. I'm really glad I enjoyed feeling better this morning without needing to put a number on it. This is going to be so good for me. I can tell already.

Have a great day everyone!

Thanks Buns. I love your journal too. In fact, I think I'll head over there now.

I'm rockin' out Day 5!!

I went to work at 6:30 this morning because today is a "Girls on the Run" day. I have GOTR at 3pm and the weather is supposed to be nice. Last week I was so traumatized by the practice I came home and passed out on the couch, woke up a couple hours later and ran to the store for garbage. So, here's hoping I can handle the chaos a little better this week.

All you parents out there probably think it's hilarious that I can't handle 75 minutes with a group 3rd through 6th grade girls but, man, they're killin' me! It's like herding cats. I kid you not. In fact, I think I can control my cats a little better. I may not be cut out for this. I'm going to jail on Thursday to meet with drug addicts and alcoholics in orange jump suits who are angry they're there and refuse to take responsibility for themselves and I feel more comfortable with them than little girls. I spoke at a substance abuse treatment center last week and, again, felt right at home. Children frighten me and wear me out.

Sigh. Anyhoo, food is fantastic! I feel fantastic. I'm eating exactly the same thing today I ate yesterday. I'm totally embracing the oatmeal. Who knew I could throw some fresh blueberries in there and change my whole relationship with the oat.

I have NOT been on the scale and I hardly think about it now. It does pop into my head when I first get out of bed but it's easy to let it go.

I have a 5 mile run tonight after GOTR. I think I will run right away even if I feel exhausted from the coaching. I think if I had run right away last week I wouldn't have broken down with the food. There's something about taking a nap or waking up at 7pm that makes me think I need to eat crap. Maybe it's a throw-back from my drinking days. I was always passing out on the couch and then waking up at odd times of day craving grease. I was so hung-over and dehydrated I thought I needed fat, salt, and sweet simultaneously. Don't know why but I've heard other people say the same thing. Thank goodness that is not my life anymore. Here's hoping eating that kind of food is not part of my life anymore either.

OK, back to work. I hope everyone else has a beautiful day too. 79 for the high today!

You have the right idea, I think: take a run instead of passing out. Way to think about your triggers! And I'm with you on the herd of little girls. NO THANKS!!! I look at youth leaders with amazement, awe, and respect when i think of what they do...voluntarily, and more than once!

keep on going. It's exciting to read about your new gusto for this. It's coming to me, too. Today when i got home I made my daughter put away the thin mint Girl Scout cookies, instead of having "just one"... which is where I was just a few days ago.

so, you're doing it! I hope I can keep up.

kk, yay for day 5! I like your energy and your attitude.

About the little brats. I have a kid and a group like that would intimidate me too. It's good they have you.

Thanks Anna and Buns.

Day 6 is ab fab!!!!

Little note about last night's GOTR practice: I ENJOYED it!!!!!!! Yes, you read that correctly. No one is more surprised than me. Apparently bribery works. Well, maybe I should call a reward system. The girls were supposed to run for 35 minutes. In the past it was like pulling teeth to get them to do anything for longer than 5-10 minutes. The program uses running to teach young girls about self-esteem, developing their own value systems, standing up to bullies, and being a part of a community. I guess parents think it sounds great and sign their girls up for it but the girls don't necessarily like running. So, it can be a real challenge to get someone to run who doesn't want to.

Anyhoo, I had promised to pick up some stickers before last night's practice and ran to the dollar store. There were all these super cute/cool things there like bunny ears and jump ropes and glow sticks (apparently glow sticks are the equivalent of gold to the 9-11 year old girl demographic). I also got cute pencils and erasers and stickers. I decided to challenge the girls and depending on how far they ran in the time period would depend on the level of coolness of the prize they could pick. They all wanted to know how many laps they had to run to get the glow sticks! I told them and they HAULED ASS!!!! I couldn't believe it. One girl had a bit of a tummy ache and I told her she could just walk but she wanted that glow stick. They were all laughing and smiling and running and it was a blast.

I went home from GOTR and did my tempo run and ate some rice and beans. I did my dishes and planned my food for today and got it all ready. I watched Biggest Loser and then read a book for awhile. I went to bed and got to work close to on-time today!

It all blends together for me. When I eat poorly I have no energy to clean my house or prepare meals or chop veggies. So, I get up in the morning with nothing prepared and dirty dishes all over the kitchen and I just want to go back to bed. I dink around on the Internet or I fall asleep on the couch and I'm late for work. When I'm late for work I don't park in my free space a mile from my office. Instead I park in the ramp next to my building that costs money I don't have. Then I grab a vegan scone and butter croissant for breakfast, more crap for lunch and by 3pm I'm crashing. So, I go to the Canteen store for Reece's Peanut Butter Cups or Nutty Bars or whatever and eat the whole bag. I get home and I'm tired and have a headache and I'm anxious about how much money I'm spending. I don't want to run or clean the kitchen or cook so I grab something crappy to eat. I wake up the next morning and the cycle continues.

Changing one thing sets in motion a domino effect. This change can be positive like getting everything ready the night before or it can be negative like eating a bunch of garbage. I realize that I can make a lot of things better by changing one thing. It's less intimidating as well. I don't think I need to clean my house, chop a 1000 veggies, get up early, run a marathon, blah blah blah. I just need to make one change and stick with it and the ripple effect will clean up everything else (or at least a lot of it).

I feel very positive today. I hope everyone here feels good today too. If not maybe you have time to read some of the inspiring journals I rely on for courage, strength and hope.

BRILLIANT.

I want a glow stick.

Nomi, I want one too! I'm going back to buy more this weekend.

This is awesome! Great observations,as usual,KK!!! You rock!!

My computer crashed...hubby out of town all week...writing on my ipod sucks...

Love your attitude!

I'm glad your GOTR turned out so cool. I want a glow stick, too!

So how many laps do we have to run to get a glow stick?

8 laps (2 miles) gets you a glow stick! But, you can walk, run, skip, or jog. It doesn't matter how you get there as long as you use your legs to do it.

Day 7:

I feel really good. I have a 5 mile run on tap for tonight. I'm excited about this little lake a friend told me about this weekend. It's about 2 miles around. It's 3 miles from my house to the lake so it was perfect for my 8 mile run on Sunday but I realized I could drive out there tonight and run around a couple times plus a little more. So, that's the plan.

I was really tired last night and did not do my dishes or prep my food. I overslept this morning and was really late for work. I decided to stop the dominoes today. One or two mistakes does not have to knock the rest of the dominoes down. I knew I had a McD black bean soup cup at the office along with some salsa and banana peppers. So, I grabbed some lettuce and cherry tomatoes to take to work for a taco salad. I also ate a quick bowl of Kashi cereal before heading out. It's not the best breakfast option and I actually prefer my oats and blueberries but it's what I could do today. It's certainly a step up from the vegan scone and butter croissant I normally buy when this happens.

Anyhoo, lunch came around and I had my taco salad. Now I'm still planning my run after work. I should be focusing on work rather than posting in my journal but, baby steps, right?

OK, now I really will work. Have a great day!