I woke up this morning with a new found feeling of energy and health. I wanted to cry, honestly. I just keep feeling better and better ~ when I think I am already feeling great. I have learned so much this past year about myself and my habits. I have also learned that I needed to go through a process to detach myself from my old lifestyle (a process that will continue for quite some time, I am sure).
People can tell you to do something and for those that can just do it ~ extraordinary. I have to muddle through and learn it for myself with the signs pointing in the right direction. I have moved through the phases of giving up the things I feel I was addicted to. I am in another phase now... giving up oil. My brain is bursting this morning with awareness. Giving up something is as easy as making a choice, then making a plan minus beating oneself up.
I had determined in the new year to avoid oil at all cost. It took two days for me to falter. I sat and stared out the window thinking WHY? Well, because I didn't have a plan. Plain and simple. I didn't have an alternative. I allowed oil in the house without providing a delicious choice. So, the answer to me... fix it NOW. Today I am going to start making my own hummus and other plant strong dips for my guys to dip their baked chips and pieces of tortilla and veggies in. It is as simple as planning, planning, planning! In my case: it cannot be in the house. I was keeping the chips and hummus for my husband and son... without thinking through an alternative. I think they have come a long way and if I take the time to make it - they are going to eat it. Problem solved - no more oil in my house. Just one more step up the ladder of living strong and healthy.
I have found that I am enjoying my exercise! That is a new one for me. I am even craving it already because I actually found something I like. I never imagined it would be running. Ack! I hate runners! lol... I have watched them jog their perfect bodies on the road in rain, snow and sleet for years just wanting to run them down with my car.
Now I want to be one? Life makes no sense. Just running in place feels SO good. I had no idea. I didn't even know this body could
run. I'm jogging with a hundred extra pounds on my frame.... I can only imagine how amazing it will feel when I start dropping that weight. I don't have a goal to run a marathon or anything like that. I simply want to be able to go out my door and jog... so simple and something I have NEVER done. The last time I even remember running was in high school and it was a trauma. I remember doing track and field and having to launch my chubby body over hurdles... not a good experience at all. I think, shortly after that trauma, I got a note from my mom that said I could no longer participate in physical education. She was sparing me the humiliation... and I was walking deeper into my life of bad health, even at that young age.
Is it any wonder that I now see how important those hurdles really were?
That was a huge turning point in my life, that I had totally forgotten until I recently started my exercise. I won't be giving up so easily this time. I will be fighting through.
I'm kinda tired of being the fat kid that everyone points at!