Well, post marathon weekend of eating and not exercising, and my weight is now up 3 pounds to 159. I'm discouraged. Can't seem to settle into any consistency with dieting. Same old story. On a cheerier note, it's cool, breezy, and we have scattered showers that are making the plants happy. I've been trying to read Doug Lisle's book, but it's not doing much for me so far, but I'm only on Chapter 2.
I saw a rerun last night of Oprah's meltdown about her weight gain in 2009 back up into the 200 pound range. She talked to the audience the first 30 minutes of the show and then with Bob Greene and a guest, Carly something who's a singer, you'll probably know who. Anyway, the bottom line for Oprah as reinforced by Bob Greene is that none of us have a weight issue - we have an issue or issues that we soothe by eating. I think this is probably true. But there's also the factor of all the refined and junk food that's available everywhere, all the time. And she concluded that it's impossible for her to lose weight without exercising everyday, both aerobically and using weights. The richest woman in the USA has the same struggles as me and you, and the solutions are the same with or without personal coaches. Personal responsibility.
I'm struggling with the question of whether or not this is a diet that I can do permanently. I've been unsuccessful for years at doing it, because I haven't resolved this question in my mind. In order to commit to something, I have to believe in it 100% and see it as a long term solution, and I'm not there with McDougalling. I'm not there with any diet, whether vegan, high protein, Ayurvedic, blood type, Pritikin, etc. The information Dr. McDougall teaches makes sense and is reinforced by other researchers such as Dr. Campbell, Dr. Barnard, etc. I wish I could get over this hurdle. I do know that when I make up my mind about something in a way that eliminates ambiguities, I can succeed. After smoking a pack of cigarettes a day for 8 years in my 20s, I decided to quit cold turkey without patches or any aides, and I've never looked back, never smoked again. So I know I can lose weight if I can just get my mind 100% behind it. I just don't know how to get that 100% mindset with this effort because it doesn't have the all or nothing, black and white elements of smoking. We all have to eat everyday, several times a day. And further complicating things, we all (or probably all) have to exercise as well to lose weight. So maybe it's impossible to get the black-and-white mindset that works so well for me. Hmm. So with smoking, as with alcohol, the stuff is always available at stores, just as refined and junk foods are. I can easily abstain from tobacco and alcohol. So the mere availability of weight promoting foods probably isn't a real obstacle for me. I know some people have to get all the tempting foods out of the house and I've tried this strategy with my husband to no avail. He likes to eat, and brings home every day, foods such as chips, desserts, etc. and won't cooperate with eating them away from home. I've given up being angry or argumentative about this because it's just not worth the effort. However, did I continue to have cigarettes in my house after I quit? NO! And I doubt any recovering alcoholic can have alcohol in his or her home either. So what to do? Maybe argue with my husband some more. But all this doesn't address the 100% convinced mindset that I know would work for me. How do I get that? That's what I need to figure out.
I'm sure this is the most boring blog possible. But if I got anything out of Oprah's show last night it was that each of us has to figure out the answers to our own rock bottom questions. We have to figure out what is rock bottom for us. If you've read this far, thanks for "listening." I feel a little embarrassed to be hashing this stuff out in an even quasi public forum, but it does feel as though it may be helpful. I hope it may be helpful to you as well, but at the very least not harmful.