thank you both for the feedback! even though my dr is helping me, i still need help figuring out how to do it all.
i DO have digestive enzymes in my cabinet and they contain the exzyme for the beans but i also read this from Mcdougall so maybe i can do this and it will solve the problem:
Quote:
Sprouting beans: One reliable way to "de-gas" legumes is to sprout them first. Cover beans with water for 12 hours, drain off water, lay damp paper towels on the bottom of a baking dish, spread out beans on the moist towels, then let them sprout for the next 12 hours. When you notice tiny white shoots (1/16") beginning to appear they are ready to cook. (There will not be green shoots and leaves.) The tiny plant is utilizing the indigestible sugars for growth. Needless to say, beans will take less time to cook after sprouting.
i was thinking i can take the rice and use whole instead of split peas and lentils and soak them separately over night, sprout during the day and cook at night. then how long is this good in the fridge? i can also freeze it and use it later? then the cooking time is less too. ive read a lot of sprouting increasing protein and easing digestion. and its just adding water and rinsing so not much effort. i just dont like spending a long time actually cooking. this would decrease that a lot. then i can cook and freeze portions too.
i will try the rice porridge adding almond milk at the end like i liked the oats.
i will start with lundberg rice for safety sake starting out. thanks.
the whole fruit with the skin i guess is hard to digest. i will research it if so cause i could peel the apples. i love apples. when i dont eat thats the last thing i take out.
right now i know i have to not stress on eating right because it gets overwhelming and when i limit myself then i get depressed and dont want to eat out of boredom. i think thats why many anorexics limit their diet so much because if you eat only a couple foods every day and every meal then its so easy to skip a meal or eat less. least thats what happens to me.
i like corn thins so i might get those and limit myself to one with the eggless tofu salad? i am too overwhelmed to make it myself right now. maybe in 2 weeks. my portions are small so overall it wont make that much of a difference. i know oils arent good but she told me i need to get in some fats and the whole fats are a bit difficult right now til things digest better. i allow myself a tsp of oil in things now to cut back the seeds and so far thats been smart balance but i could allow vegenaise for now too and later i will make it healthier. food preperation is too stressful sometimes and so is eating so i'm trying to make 2 changes max in a week so i dont get overwhelmed. i think this week trying to cook/sprout rice and lentils or peas would be enough. and hopefully get off the supplements.
somnolent, thanks for the concern. she said i wasnt dehydrated but hopefully my blood work is ok. i feel better today. i will go to the store tomorrow and then the next day i can try some new foods.

if i like the rice like the oats thats even better, it should be cheapier then no worries about gluten issues.
i'm trying not to worry about the weight because if i eat consistently my metabolism will go back to normal and i will have energy to exercise so maybe what i'm eating now will be too little. so i keep telling myself it will be ok.
oh as far as meditation, yes i do it sort of. in my art. i was never good at sitting there but my art creates the same peace and comfort as meditation. even so i havent felt well lately but i hope to start back soon. i got a prescription for ativan again, i wasnt doing well without it and if i can calm down more and make this less stress ful, maybe in time i wont need it. so i feel bad i am not doing this healthy but doing it rigidly and controlling it all is anorexia and i need to stop controlling things and be more normal and go with the flow. i actually feel better now not doing things "perfect" because trying to be better then others by being so rigid with my food makes me feel separate and lonely and i want to be normal now. thanks for the support. sorry i'm going on and on lol. just helps to talk to someone my struggles.