Dissolution wrote:
Have had these conversations this past week;
Diabetic (My friend who I haven't seen in 80 pounds, who's taking a bunch of medication and can't get his blood sugar under 300)
Me: "I was in exactly the same position. You need to get your dietary fat intake down to 10% or less, to start the process of reversing your diabetes."
Diabetic: "But I like eating the fat on my steak!"
Me: "But that comes with a side of diabetes."
Diabetic: "....."
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Co-Worker: "My wife and I tried going Vegan for a month."
Me: "Really? How did it work out for you?"
Co-Worker: "It wasn't too bad, we'd have an egg-white omelette for breakfast, and then tuna for lunch...."
Me: "Wait wait...That's not Vegan."
Co-Worker: "It's not?"
Me: "No, Vegan means no meat or animal products at all, including eggs, and dairy."
Co-Worker: "Oh, I thought it was Vegan because we ate lots of vegetables."
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Co-Worker#2: "What kind of diet are you on?"
Me: "Plant based, starch centered, whole food, low fat."
Co-Worker#2: "Huh?"
Me: "Low-fat Vegan."
Co-Worker#2: "Oh ok, you still eat chicken and fish right?"
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Co-Worker#3: "You have to drink milk to be healthy."
Me: "So you're saying that we're the only creature on the planet that needs to consume the milk of another animal, for our entire lives to be healthy?"
Co-Worker#3: Ummm...Well....Yeah?
Me: "And you actually believe that?"
Co-Worker#3: "Stop talking to me!"
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And this one is from a while back;
DIL: "My Mom is a vegetarian."
Me: "I didn't know that."
DIL: "Yeah, she only eats bison and turkey."
Me: "That's NOT vegetarian. Vegetarians don't eat ANY meat."
DIL: "Well, she doesn't eat any red meat."
Me: "Bison is red meat."
DIL: "Well, it's not store bought meat."
Me: "Your Mother raises bison?!"
DIL: "No of course not."
Me: "So where does she get the bison meat."
DIL: "She buys it at the organic grocery store."
Me: "Do you ever stop and listen to yourself?"
DIL: "Stop picking on me!"
Me: "....."
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Ha ha!

This sounds too funny to be true, like something you would hear from Dave Letterman after he became a McDougaller!
Keep us laughing, Dissolution!!! 